Monday, December 31, 2012

Does My Ex Still Love Me

If you can't seem to get your ex off out of your mind, you are probably wondering if your ex is feeling the same way about you.  And, it is likely that you have been thinking about reconciling with your ex.  You are curious about the possibilities; however, you want to be cautious because you don't want to face another breakup.  You want to know for certain if the question "does my ex still love me" can be answered with a "yes"!

Of course, you cannot exactly see what is in another person's heart; however, there are several distinctive signs that will tell you without a doubt if your ex is still in love with you.  Check out the following list--if any of these characteristics describe the behavior of your ex, then you can be sure that your ex definitely loves you.

--Your ex keeps an eye on you behind your back.


Any ex who does this is most assuredly still in love!  After all, why else would he care about how you have been doing or what is going on in your life?  If he asks your friends about you or if he has his friends 'accidentally' run into you in order to check up on you, this is a very positive sign.

--When you speak with your ex, he continually brings up memories of when you were together.


If he is thinking a lot about the good times of your relationship, he is thinking about what it would be like if the two of you were back together.  Chatting together about "remember whens" is not typical ex conversation--this means that he is feeling loving toward you.

--Your ex contacts you frequently.


Most of the time when people break up, they don't phone each other much.  So, if your ex is calling you on a regular basis, this shows that he is thinking of you regularly. 

--Your ex seems to show up wherever you are.


Has this happened again and again?  Well, it isn't an accident that he is turning up all the time--no matter what he says.  He keeps coming around because he has a need to be around you.  His need to be around you comes from the love that he still has for you.

--Your ex apologized for the breakup of the relationship.


This one is a biggie.  A lot of guys have a hard time admitting that they are at fault in a relationship; therefore, if your ex apologizes for his wrong-doing in the relationship (regardless of whether or not that wrong-doing was the actual cause of the breakup), this shows that he really cares.  It shows that he wants you to know that he feels sorry for how the relationship went and that he wishes he could make things right somehow. 


All of these signs point to one clear answer--love.  You don't need to wonder "Does my ex still love me?" any longer. Just think about your ex's behavior, and you will know.

Sunday, December 30, 2012

Dealing With A Marriage In Crisis


Marriage isn't easy, even in the best of times.  But in the worst of times--when a marriage is going through a period of difficulty--marriage can be quite demanding.  This is why divorce is so common nowadays.  There is, however, a method in which a couple can deal with a marriage in crisis

This method works no matter what type of crisis the couple is hit with, whether it is a death or illness in the family, a natural disaster, trouble with the law, problems with children, or some other type of issue.

How can couples deal with a critical juncture in their marriage?  The basic method involves having a plan in place ahead of time, before such an eventuality occurs.  In other words, the couple needs to know how to handle an emergency or urgent problem before any type of predicament happens.  The tactics outlined below will suffice for most couples in working out most any type of critical situation.  By following these suggestions, couples should be able to deal with any marriage crisis as it arises.

--Do not blame each other for the circumstances or situation that you are in.  Blaming does not solve anything, and it could make things worse as it can increase hostility between the two of you.  Instead, be in control of your own actions and be supportive of your spouse's needs.

--Try to lower your expectations of how everyday life should function when dealing with a marriage predicament.  For example, you may need to eat meals out more often rather than cooking at home as you usually would.  Or, you may have to let the housekeeping slide if there isn't time to handle the regular daily upkeep of the home. 

Do not expect your spouse to pick up your slack as far as everyday life activities go; instead, consider hiring outside help or asking friends for assistance.  By not placing extra work on your spouse, the difficult period in your life will likely be less traumatic because you will be able to rely on your spouse for support.

--Make sure that you are communicating well with your spouse.  Do not use harsh language when speaking; rather, use calm, patient wording.  Speak to your spouse as you would like your spouse to speak to you.  Without good, strong communication, a marriage crisis can turn into material for a divorce--and this is definitely not what anyone wants.  So, be open-minded when having discussions and be sure to listen to your spouse's point of view.  Above all else, be able to forgive and move on if there are any issues with miscommunication.

--Approach the situation together.  A marriage in crisis is a problem for the couple, not for one spouse or the other; therefore, both people in the marriage need to work together in order to be able to get past the trauma.  Working together can mean facing the problem as one or it can mean getting therapy as a couple; this will depend upon the exact crisis that the couple is having.  

Saturday, December 29, 2012

Tips On How To Get Your Lover Back

If your lover just broke up with you, but you are still deeply in love, chances are you would love to learn how to get your lover back.  After all, your love is telling you that you belong together!  Maybe down deep in your heart you are certain that you are soul mates.  Soul mates deserve to be together, don't they?  Of course they do--but, it may take a bit of time and effort to get your lover to realize that.  Your lover needs to come to understand the reasons why you belong together; only then will he return to you.
There are, however, some ways in which you can help to get your lover to become conscious of the reasons why the two of you are, indeed, made for each other.  If you follow these tips, your relationship will be back on course before long.

--Back away from your lover.


This sounds counterintuitive; after all, you want to be back with your lover, not apart from him.  But, this advice is sound because after a breakup, your lover will need some space and time to think.  If you are constantly hanging around, talking about how much you still love him and need him, it will only serve to make him think that he was right to break up with you because you are overbearing and needy. 

Instead, refrain from speaking about your feelings for him.  It is ok to show that you still care; for instance, you could still call him if he has a death in the family.  Do not go overboard, though; buying him a $200 watch for his birthday is not appropriate when you have broken up.  Also, in giving him space and time it is wise to stay away from him most of the time.  Sure, drop in at a party where he will be or grab a coffee at his favorite coffee shop; however, if you do this too often it will seem like you are hovering around him.

--Avoid calling or texting your lover.


This can be difficult, to be sure.  There are likely to be a million times each day that you want to pick up the phone just to call or text him, yet this is the last thing that you should do.  Why?  Well, cutting off communication is the best way to get your lover to begin to miss you.  And, if he starts to miss you, that will certainly lead to him coming back to you!

--Live your own life.


Don't sit at home sulking and crying about your breakup.  It is important that you go out and have fun with your friends and spend time with family--even if you really do not feel like doing so.  This is because your lover will hear what you have been doing, and you don't want him to hear that you have simply been pining away for him.
If you give your lover a chance to see that your relationship is meant to be, you will get your lover back.

Friday, December 28, 2012

How Can I Cope When I Miss My Girlfriend

No matter who ends a relationship or why, breakups are painful.  They can make a person feel as if the world is about to end.  The hurt that comes from a breakup can pierce a person's heart, making it feel as if it has broken, or even shattered.  And it is incredibly difficult to get over missing a former mate.

The recovery period after a relationship ends may be a few days long or a few months long--there is no telling how long it will take a person to be ready to move on.  And some people have no idea how to begin getting over an ex, or how to cope with their loss (and yes, the end of a relationship does qualify as a loss, as it is the loss of love).

If this sounds like you, if all you can think is "I miss my girlfriend," then you need to read the suggestions below.  They will help you learn how to get past the heartbreak of this ended relationship, and they will help you to find a way to feel strong enough to move on.

First of all, you do need to know that it is completely ok to feel the way that you are feeling.  A lot of guys tend to hide the fact that they are upset by a breakup; however, it is far healthier to admit that you are sad or angry or hurt.  You should even go ahead and cry if you feel the need.  Make sure to talk to friends about the relationship as well and let them know how you are feeling; good friends will offer advice or insight.

Go ahead and take care of yourself at this time when you are missing your girlfriend.  Pamper yourself, even, by making sure to do the things that you love best.  Rent or Netflix some popular movies (no chick flicks are necessary now!) and snack on your favorite junk food.  Have a guys' poker night or guys' night out.

Now, before you go out and start dating other people you are going to want to get all of your old feelings for your girlfriend out.  Do not do this by calling her or emailing her!  Instead write a letter, including all of the reasons you were hurt and why you miss her.  Also include all of the reasons why you are glad the relationship ended--mention all of her bad habits that used to get on your nerves and all of her irritating little quirks, for instance.  Let everything out in the letter.  But--and this is VERY important--do NOT mail the letter (mailing the letter would be quite counterproductive, as it would bring your girlfriend back into your life).  Burn it instead, as a symbol of letting all of your old feelings dissipate and go away.

When "I miss my girlfriend" is all you can think, try the plan above--it can truly help you to cope when you are feeling as if you cannot go on after a relationship ends.

Thursday, December 27, 2012

He Dumped Me--How Do I Get Over It

Everyone hopes that their relationships will stand the test of time.  Unfortunately, though, many relationships fail--and most of us end up dealing with more than a few broken hearts during our lifetimes.  It's tough enough when a breakup happens as a mutual decision; however, when a guy dumps you, that can make it even more difficult to handle. 

If he dumped you and you need some help in getting over the loss, read the following suggestions and give them a try.  They will help you to live through the stormy days following the breakup and come out on the other side feeling ready to move on.

If You Want Your Ex Back, Click Here To Get a Step-by-Step System To Get Your Ex Back

1.  Go ahead and grieve.


While it may sound melodramatic to 'grieve' over a breakup, you have experienced a deep loss.  Therefore, you need to grieve and get those emotions out.  For the first few days it is ok to cry and mope around and feel sorry about what you have lost.  Get support from close friends if needed, but do NOT contact your ex.  You need to let go of the relationship, act as if it is buried and gone.

2.  Get rid of any evidence of your ex.


Go through all of your belongings and get rid of everything that reminds you of the breakup.  Put away all photos of him and any gifts he gave you.  As for what to do with them, it depends.  You may want to pack up photos as possible mementos for years later.  With gifts, you may want to pack them up, sell them, give them away, or donate them.  It is completely your decision as to what to do; however, be sure to get everything out of your sight.

Don't forget to change or remove any of your ex's playlists on your iPod or MP3 player.  Change your telephone ringtones if necessary as well.  Eliminate all traces of him from your life so that there will be nothing to remind you of him on a daily basis.

3.  Make a list of what irked you about your ex.


Yes, right now you are still missing him because he dumped you; however, take a few moments and think about how your relationship really was.  There had to be some habits or quirks about your boyfriend that you found to be exasperating.  Write these down--as many as you can.  Think about everything, from big issues (maybe he refused to stop talking on his cell while driving, even though you considered this to be dangerous) to the little concerns (perhaps he often spilled sugar on the counter when making his morning coffee and never wiped it up).

The point of making this list is to show you that your relationship was not perfect and that your ex is not worthy of being worshiped.  In addition, you may just see that there were troubles in the relationship...and that perhaps a part of you already realized that you two weren't the ideal couple.


Maybe he dumped you--but you will survive and find a way to move on if you follow these suggestions.   

Wednesday, December 26, 2012

How Can I Move On When She Broke My Heart

At some point, most everyone must deal with a broken heart.  For some people, the experience isn't too horrid; perhaps a few weeks of sorrow and misery, and then they are back in the dating pool.  For other people, though, it can be quite traumatic when a relationship ends.  This may be because some people are more prone toward feeling grief and depression. 

For many, the most anguish-ridden breakups are when a particularly long relationship has come to an end. No matter the reason, here are some suggestions for helping anyone move on after suffering extreme heartache.

If you have recently gone through a breakup, you are likely experiencing a good deal of sadness, bitterness, and pain.  Do you often think "she broke my heart"?  Then these suggestions will help you to move on and get past your feelings of despondency.  Try these ideas as soon as possible so that you can get back to feeling happy and confident in yourself.

--Face the facts, but be realistic.


Yes, your relationship ended.  Yes, "she broke my heart" is a good description of what happened.  Neither of these statements mean that there is anything wrong with you or that you are unlovable.  Nor do they mean that you will never find another person to love.  To think that is being unrealistic. 

Be practical in your thoughts about your relationship.  The person you were with chose not to be with you, and that is what you must accept.  She was only one person, though, and her thoughts about you and this particular relationship will have no bearing on your future relationships.  Although she did break your heart, her power over you isn't absolute--she cannot hurt you any more than you let her.

--Get your ex out of your home.


Pack up everything your ex ever gave you, as well as every photograph you have of her.  Some people might advise throwing these items away; however, you might want to keep some items to possibly revisit at a later stage in your life when you can do so with fond memories.  In any case it is completely your choice as to what to do with the items--just do something with them to get them out of sight.  Be sure to change any electronic settings she decided upon as well, such as phone messages and ring tones or alarm clock settings.

Getting rid of all of these trinkets and photos helps because you will no longer have constant reminders of her in every area of your home and life.

--Write a letter to your ex.


This letter will never be mailed.  Instead, it will serve to work out your frustrations with the heartbreak.  In the letter, write down all of your emotions, rant and rave, whatever it takes to make you feel better.  Read the letter each time you think about how "she broke my heart."  Eventually, the feelings will dull and you will be ready to move on to a fresh new life without your ex.

How To Save My Marriage--Try Talking

Every marriage has problems and issues.  And every couple has their own way of dealing with the troubles that come up in a marriage.  Many times, people can work out their matters of contention through talking.  But, there are a great many couples who lack the skills to handle problems through talking because they simply do not understand how to speak to each other correctly.  These people need help learning how to appropriately talk to their spouses.

If you have trouble talking about problems with your spouse, and if you are wondering "how to save my marriage?" then this article is for you.  You will learn some simple suggestions for dealing with issues in your marriage by talking--or, rather, by changing how you are talking.

When thinking about saving your marriage, you need to think about some habits of which you may be guilty.  Of course, your spouse may have these habits as well.  But, if you start working on changing how you speak to your spouse, chances are your spouse will follow suit, changing how he speaks to you.  And, once the two of you begin speaking to each other respectfully and appropriately all of the time, your marriage will no longer need saving!

Here are the habits that you may need to change:

--Complaining

Are you a big complainer, grumbling about anything and everything?  This habit can be quite annoying--even if your spouse is a complainer as well.  Complainers tend to look for the negative aspects of life rather than the positive.  And, if you are a bellyacher, your spouse may be wondering what type of complaints you have about him.  Try to complain only when necessary, such as if a restaurant meal isn't up to par.

--Criticizing

Many people feel comfortable criticizing their spouses because they do not feel threatened.  However, your spouse is the last person you should criticize; after all, this is the person who vowed to love and cherish you until death.  So, why are you purposely trying to find fault in this person?  Or, if not that, why are you pointing out all of his faults?

--Nagging

This type of behavior simply never works--it is just annoying.  Instead of nagging, try gently suggesting to your spouse that you need something done.  Then, if he doesn't do it, let it go.  No, this isn't ideal in terms of getting things done; however, it does wonders for keeping peace in your marriage.  As for the tasks your spouse doesn't do, either do them yourself or hire some assistance.

--Blaming

Do you blame your spouse when something goes wrong, regardless of whether or not it was his fault?  This is not helpful at all; in fact, it leads to much frustration and unhappiness on the part of your spouse.  Blaming is never helpful.  Rather than blaming, try talking to your spouse when something goes wrong and working out how to solve the problem. 

By changing the way you speak with your spouse, you will no longer need to worry about "how to save my marriage."

Monday, December 24, 2012

How Can I Make My Boyfriend Get Back Together With Me

Breakups happen for a variety of reasons, and sometimes relationships just aren't meant to be.  This isn't the case for every relationship, though.  A number of breakups happen for trivial reasons or during the heat of the moment.  Some guys simply decide to split up with a woman because of their friends or as a result of a misunderstanding or countless other peculiar or baffling causes.  It really doesn't matter what the reason was for the breakup, though--you can make your boyfriend get back together with you if you try, regardless of why he broke up with you.

You are likely wondering exactly how you can get your boyfriend to want to come back to you.  Frankly, it may not be simple; however, if you follow these tips, you will see success.

First of all, it is important to think about why your relationship ended.  You will need to figure out a way to fix the problem that caused the breakup; after all, if this issue is not addressed and corrected, chances are it could cause another breakup in the future.  And will your boyfriend get back together with you a second time after splitting up again because of the same issue? It's doubtful.  So it is in your best interest to take care of any problems now, before reconciling.

Next, think about improving your appearance.  Try out a new hairstyle or new hair color.  Get some new clothing outfits, or work on creating new looks with the clothing you already own.  A change in your appearance is something that will definitely catch your boyfriend's eye.

It is also a good idea to try to get people talking about you around your boyfriend, if possible.  For instance, you could ask mutual friends to chat about a new promotion you got or about the travel plans you are considering for the following summer.  When your boyfriend hears about you in different and exciting ways, he will begin to think about how nice it would be if he were sharing those adventures with you.  He will also remember the fun times you and he had together.

Go to places that your boyfriend goes to--but, do not be blatant about your intentions of getting back together as a couple.  For example, it would make sense for you to go to a coffee shop in the neighborhood in which both of you live (just happening to drop in when you know he might be there, of course).  Attending parties hosted by mutual friends is also fine.  However, it would be a bad idea to drive a half hour out of your way just to have lunch at a diner near his workplace--that is far too obvious.

Think about why your boyfriend originally fell in love with you.  Try to be that person again.  Be positive and casual when you are around your boyfriend.  Eventually, he'll want to come back to you to rebuild your relationship.

Sunday, December 23, 2012

My Girlfriend Dumped Me--Do I Take Her Back


Relationships are complicated, and each one has its own unique issues and concerns.  And, while some relationships stand the test of time, many aren't quite that lucky.  Unfortunately, in some instances a guy just gets dumped by his girl.  Maybe she has found another guy, or perhaps she has been listening to her mother grumble about the guy for too long, or it could be that she has some other reason for wanting to break up.  In any case, sometimes the girlfriend is the one to end the relationship.

Help Me Get My Ex Back - Click Here


Yet this is not always the end of everything--many times, the girlfriend will contact the guy, wanting another go at the relationship.  This is not such an easy decision to make for the guy.  "My girlfriend dumped me, but now she expects me to just take her back as if nothing happened?"  How is a guy supposed make that type of decision?

If you have found yourself in this type of situation, you have come to the right place.  Here's a guideline you can follow that contains suggestions to help you come to an answer as to whether or not to take your girlfriend back.  Read on for tips on how to reach your final decision.

In order to make a rational determination (in other words, one that is not simply based upon a need or want for sex), it is necessary to do some solid thinking.  Emotions must be cut out of the initial decision-making process.  Yes, this may be difficult if you really love her; however, emotions can cloud your thinking so it is best to block them from your thoughts.

Now, when thinking about whether or not to take your girlfriend back, you need to first think about why it is that she left in the first place.  Did she leave to be with another guy?  Did she break up because she wanted some space?  Or did she dump you because her friends thought she could do better (as in find a better-looking/richer/whatever type of guy)?  The reason she left will give you a big clue as to if you should give her another chance or not.  For instance, if you think she is truly sorry for listening to her friends or that she got the space she needed and is now missing you, maybe another chance would be a good idea. But if she left you for another guy...well, that might mean she wasn't satisfied with you--and that she might cheat on you or leave you again in the future.

Next, consider why she came back after she dumped you.  This, too, will give you good insight.  If she suddenly realized how wonderful you are, take her back.  If she came back because she couldn't find anyone else, though, you'd be making a mistake to try the relationship again.

Think carefully before taking a girlfriend back--"my girlfriend dumped me" isn't the end of the world.

Saturday, December 22, 2012

Solutions To Everyday Love Problems

Studies have suggested that while everyday fights may not get to you and your loved one immediately, it does eventually take its toll. You can't expect to solve all your problems with just a snap. Nonetheless, there are things you can do as an individual and as a couple to do more than just hold grudges. If you're as invested in your relationship as you believe you are, it's time to make a few small changes. Adjust to your needs and know what your partner wants. Don't expect the other person's mind to work like yours. You may not be in the same frequency all the time, but your man will certainly appreciate you if you show him respect.

You Get Into an Argument


You both blow your tops. Sure, arguments are part and parcel of every relationship, but then again, you also need to choose your battles. So what if he's into his Monday night football games? You also have your own thing. Never leave an argument feeling unsettled. Not only will you lose sleep, you'll also feel listless and uneasy while you haven't settled your issues with your man just yet. After a blowup, call a friend. Don't confront him while your tempers are flaring. Just know that most men prefer to keep their opinions to themselves. Even if they have a best friend to run to, they don't always run out the door to talk about what had just transpired. It might take him longer to recover from a tiff, which is why you also need to be careful who you share your sob stories with. Never go to a friend who loves to meddle. Remember, only two people are involved here: him and you. Open up and talk about it if you must, but remember, this isn't about getting anyone on your side. It's more on you looking for a way to feel better without having to drag anyone else into it.

If You Haven't Seen Him in a While


They say that absence makes the heart grow fonder, but if you spend too much time apart, this could be worrisome as well. Just remember to know when your demands are reasonable. You don't need to spend every waking hour with him near you. It's more about the quality of time you have when you're together. You can make it through a couple of days without seeing him. What's more important here is that you know he's thinking about you. And when you do get to meet, be affectionate and show him how much you value his presence. This could actually be the very thing that inspires him to go out of his way to see you more often.

When Both Your Tempers are Running High


Some fights are triggered by stress. Beat burnout  by lifting each other's sprits up. Don't expect him to do all the work. Relationships are all about the give and take. You get what you put forth and also know that you can rely on yourself to feel better. Men like women who are independent. Show him that you're a strong and solid woman who wants nothing but the best for her man. If you see that he's unable to take any more stress, make him a cup of coffee and talk about more interesting things. He'll open up to you if and when he's ready, and that time will only come when he sees that you're not there to add stress to his life. In fact, he can count on you to put a smile on his face after a long and tedious day in the office.

You Don't Like Some of the People He Hangs Out with


Be it with his mom or a group of guy friends who can be obnoxious at times, value his personal time and see why he loves these people. Openly and frankly telling him that his friends are douchebags only drives the wedge deeper into your growing distance. Be civil and get to know the individuals in his life. He must love them for a reason and it's time you see and understand why he does.

I Want My Husband Back--What Can I Do

If your husband has left you, or if you and your husband are currently separated, you may now be thinking, "I want my husband back."  You may also be wondering what you can do to make that happen--or questioning if it is even possible.  Frankly, you are right to be uncertain about whether or not you can make your husband come back to you.  After all, getting your husband to want to return to you will take work, determination, and perseverance. 

Your success will depend upon your ability to keep making an effort, even if it may seem hopeless at times.  In other words, you can get your husband back--if you don't back down and stop trying.

Now that you know that it is, indeed, possible to get your husband to come back, you are certainly wondering how it is that you are supposed to actually go about the process of getting him back.  First of all, you need to know that the following plans will work differently for each couple's situation.  You also need to know that there is no set timeframe for how long it will take to get your husband to come back to you, as that depends completely upon your individual relationship.  Just keep working with these ideas and you will eventually see success.

--Be his friend.


This is the first step.  Instead of trying to be his wife, be your husband's friend.  Whenever you and he are together (no matter the setting), just show him that you can be around him without getting emotional.  Refrain from speaking about the marriage at all; instead, just have fun together as you would with any friend.

The point of this is simple.  When the tensions and stresses of marital life have been removed from your relationship, your husband will once again see what a wonderful person you are.  He will start to see why he fell for you in the first place, and he will start to fall for you all over again.

--Quit contacting him.


Stop calling him, especially in regards to asking him to come back.  In fact, you should only call him if you need to; for instance, you should call your husband if there is a death in the family or some other important emergency.  Otherwise, do not contact him.

The reason for not calling your husband is to give him time and space.  This will allow him to begin to miss you.  After all, if you are calling him every day, how can he miss being with you?

--Make him want you.


It is a good idea to change or update your appearance in order to gain your husband's interest.  Making yourself look good will also make you feel good, and this will work to attract your husband.  Be just a bit flirty when you see your husband, but don't overdo it--let him make the first move.


When "I want my husband back" is all you can think of, follow these plans--they will work for you if you try.

Calm Down And Deal With Conflict Like An Adult


Achieving peace of mind is possible. It's not always going to be easy, especially when emotions are running high, but if you're willing to work on it, you can do anything you put your mind to. Everyone has had fights, especially with their partners. Most of the time, your past plays a large role on how you react to pressure.

You've been burned badly, and the thought of it happening again sends you running to the hills. You can never hide from reality. You may be able to avoid it for a while, but you're only delaying the situation. In the end, you still have to face the firing squad.

Just Breathe


In order to calm yourself, you need to learn the art of thinking things through. You might think that this is such a simple exercise that won’t make a difference. Well, don’t knock it "til you've tried it". It’s so simple because all you need to do is set aside a few minutes of your time each day. Look for a quiet spot and breathe in and out, slowly.

Free your mind from negative thoughts. It takes a while to perfect the art because you'll constantly be plagued with what you need to do. If it helps, remind yourself that this exercise only takes less than 5 minutes. And whenever you are upset, immediately find your safe place and count to 10. This helps a lot, especially when you tend to react quickly to the confrontation that's about to take place. More importantly, this stops you from saying things that you later end up regretting.

Take Action


Of course, problems aren't solved solely through thinking about them. You have to do the legwork to start making things happen. After you've calmed your nerves, show that you're willing to move past the fight by thinking of ways on how you can remedy the situation. If there's something that's plaguing you constantly, think of possible solutions.

Talk to friends and get well-meaning advice. If you need to confront someone, do it but also make sure that you're doing this with a clear mind. Don't let the situation turn violent. Approach your partner in a matter-of-fact fashion and be wary of the words you use. Tell them why you got hurt and try to see where they're coming from as well. Remember, kindness begets kindness.

Show Some Kindness


Another good way to calm yourself is to actually show your loved one that you're actually a good person. These may not have anything to do with your problems, but when you see that you're actually being nice, you feel more complete. You get to realize that everyone is going through something and that some people are actually worse off than others. You get to appreciate what you have, and when you get to see the look of gratitude on their face, you'll feel the reward from deep within your soul. So, make sure to see the good in life and in what you have.

Every couple has their share of trials, and your relationship is no exception. There's no better way of giving you hope than knowing that you're willing to be better than the rest and that you value your loved one enough to make a change.

Wednesday, December 19, 2012

What Makes a Relationship Truly Work

They say that good communication is the number one requirement in a successful relationship. However, this doesn’t always happen. You sometimes keep things from each other because you don’t like confrontations and arguments. In the end, the frustration builds up until the gap widens. If you want to make things work, you need to bridge this gap. One way to do this is to finally open up to each other. You and your loved one need to thresh out all your feelings and opinions about something.

Hurt Isn't Always Bad


Just know that when you hurt each other, it’s a sign that you still care. Couples who have grown out of love tend to be distant and indifferent. Hence, it’s time to sit down together and make plans. If you’re about to make a decision that affects and changes your future, weigh all the options that you have. Discuss all the points. In order to do this, you need to set aside some time for the long discussion. Keep things light even if the topic is serious. This means that you need to hear each other out. See things from the other perspective and understand why people feel differently.

When it’s your turn to air out your points, make your feelings clear. This means that you need to be as honest as possible. Don’t leave out details. This might be something your partner is against, but then again, that’s why you need to make the fact that you may not always agree on something clear from the very beginning. If your partner is opposed to it, weigh the pros and cons. This is actually when you can see who makes a stronger point. All the while, be open to each other’s opinions. This may be your time to ask questions as well. The fact that you’re both ready to listen to each other already makes a world of difference. Remember this when you start to argue.

It's About Compromise


Identify a common goal. How do you see your future together? It’s nice to see that you actually are aiming for the same thing. The timetable may vary, but still, you want what’s best for the both of you. Always be sensitive to one another. This is the time where you have to be watchful of the words you use because this can really hurt the other person. When there is pain, then the whole planning process becomes more tedious. Always start by telling them that you do understand where they’re coming from.

As you work towards making a great future as a couple, you can make things a lot easier by making sure you have your own tasks to fulfill. Duties won’t seem as daunting when you know that you actually have help along the way and that there is also someone out there looking out for you. Being a couple means that you have a partner in life and that you just can’t always think about yourself. Be selfless and make your loved one feel that you value them.

Sweet Things To Do For A Boyfriend Through Being Real

Some flings turn into full-blown relationships while others fizzle within a few months. If you're into the guy, the latter can be such a painful experience. You've obviously fallen for him, but somehow, he hasn't reciprocated. Then again, what can you do? You can't chase a guy who's not interested in you. You'll only have your heart broken in the process. When it's too late, then it's too late. Learn from it and move on.

When You Meet Someone New:


The next time you do connect with a man and you want to make what you have will last, then make sure you act on it immediately. The last thing you need to become is jaded. Everyone hasn't been spared from some form of heartbreak. You can do something about it this time around.

You can make him want you more, have his heart skip a beat whenever you walk into a room. Just know men don’t like women who analyze everything. Take things a day at a time. Rather than pressuring him to give more, show him why you’re a keeper.

Be Sweet:


Be who you are with him . Talk about mundane things, crack jokes, and keep things light. Don't forget to touch him ever now and then. Graze his hand and give him a smile when you're out with a group. While you do share this friendship, he is, in fact, more than just that. Let him see the difference. 

Find the Balance:


At the same time, let him see that you're open to meeting new people and that if this thing that you have doesn't work, then it's not going to be the end of the world. Men can sense an independent woman, and somehow, this is what makes them stay longer.

Become More Attractive:


Great girls become more attractive if they're confident. You may be insecure about a lot of things but know one thing: you're a splendid catch. Don't let your insecurities rule your life. Rather, work hard at becoming a better person. If you are easygoing and confident, he'll also start to see your good side. Then, he will shower you with compliments. The more praises you get, the better you feel. Don't dismiss the things he says. Do sweet things for him as well. Thank him whenever he does something nice and reciprocate. Don't be cocky when he showers you with compliments. Rather, let him know how you value him as well. Remember, there's a fine line between confidence and cocky. Never step beyond that line because it can also be a big turn-off.

When you're with him, appreciate his presence. Enjoying each other's company is a big deal for many men. Don’t get bogged down by the lack of your relationship status because he'll eventually pull away. Keep things real. Don’t make every situation you're into a chance to be romantic. This is about having fun when you're together. Make plans with friends and ask him to join you. Don't stick to him all the time. Show him that you're okay without him. Sometimes, men want what they can't have. So, stop being clingy.

The chances of you nabbing him are much higher when you show him that you love yourself and the friends you're with more than being in a relationship, and at the same time, you also know how to make the most of your time together. Be his friend first and then give him the respect he deserves. Everything will fall into place from there.

Overcoming a Relationship Breakup Doesn't Have To Be Difficult

While your problems are your concern and no one should meddle in your relationship, you also have to realize that other people are sometimes involved. When your partner doesn't get along with your friends, things are going to be much more difficult for the both of you. Don’t let the romance fizzle, especially when it's only your pride that's getting in the way.

Love His Life


If you want your man to value you, then you need to love his friends as well. This means that if he wants some time off to be with his bros, go ahead and let him do it. If he wants you to tag along when he goes out with his friends, make sure you make the time. He'll do the same thing when he sees that you're willing to go out of your way and immerse yourself in his world from time to time.

The Extension


Breakups are difficult. Overcoming it means that you need to consider more than just the two of you. Your friends are an extension of your family, and unlike your relatives, you choose to be with them because you have so many things in common. You share the same passion and admittedly, they're also a reflection of who you are.

It's the same thing for your loved one. Imagine how uncomfortable the situation will be if you refuse to see the good in the people he cares about the most. Hang out with them. You may not always share the same interests, but try to go with the flow.

Plus, getting the stamp of approval means that you'll be in the know. They can even be your staunch defenders because they've seen effort from your end. You may not always like some of them immediately, but try to see them through your man's eyes.
Be open-minded because it does take all kinds to make the world. There must be something good in them for them to be an important part of his world.

Be Like a Friend


His friends have been with him longer than you have. You'll be privy to his childhood experiences if you learn to talk to them. Keep conversations about his exes on the down low because these are just too personal. More importantly, these should come from him. Just enjoy the time you two have together.

You wouldn’t want his buds to assume that you’re the nosy one. Keep the conversations light. For instance, ask about how he was when he was in high school. You can even turn to them for help when you want to surprise him during a special occasion.

Some women have been so successful that they were even able to merge their groups. In the end, love became sweeter because it was based on friendship. Just think of this as a chance for you to open yourself up to a world of new possibilities.

Show some excitement and you'll see. When you make the effort, you can make love blossom, to make it sweeter.

If you’re really invested in this relationship, then make sure to appreciate his world. Invite the people he loves over when you have parties and be cool about it. You don't have to try too hard.

Be yourself and be open to getting to know them. Everything will fall into place and pretty soon, you'll see that being with someone can be your chance to establish new connections.

How To Rebuild A Broken Relationship

So, you've met the love of your life. He's great because he takes care of you, he's there for all your family events, he calls you all the time, and he even gives in to what you want when you go out. Yes, everything's fine and dandy, except for one thing: your insecurities are slowly taking its toll and you don't know just how long your foundation lasts until it finally crumbles into smithereens.

Your now trying to rebuild a broken relationship, on the mend before you truly part destinies. You know that you want him in your life. Hence, letting him go forever is out of the question. You do have to do something about it, though, because if this continues, you could stay in Splitsville forever. It helps to understand where he's coming from because there might be a good explanation as to why your personalities are clashing. Target the problem and forgive each other for mistakes made. 

Everyone makes mistakes, including you. Accept that in order to rebuild a broken relationship that was once so sweet. Anger is actually a sign that he cares about you still. There are so many possible explanations as to why you've been experiencing problems. Look below because there's always something you can do if you think that what you have is worth saving:

You're not feeling validated:


You think highly of each other, but sometimes, you don't say it often enough. While actions do speak louder than words, words are still important. When you're not dishing out the sweet wonderful words, you're relationship will feel as if something's missing. It's not about validating each other all the time, but rather, it's about showing some appreciation when you do something sweet and meaningful. You'll see that when you show him that you adore him, he'll feel more secure about your relationship and he'll do the same thing for you as well.

You're insecure by nature:


While some people look good, they feel that they're unattractive. This could stem from childhood experiences. The teasing in the park and the bullying at school can have lasting effects on a person. Some people need professional help when the scars run deep, but for most people, you can simply guide them and show them what their talents are. Yes, nobody's perfect, but he loves you for the total package. The next time you feel that you're not good enough, tell him how you feel and you'll be surprised at the great things he sees in you.

You’ve been cheated on in the past:


You can't blame him for your past, and neither can he. Yes, you've met people who have jerked you around, and you've somehow lost faith in men. This is actually unfair for him. This is when you two need to sit down and seriously talk about the situation. Let him know that while your experience could have been entirely traumatic, it's only fair that you start fresh with him and not form any preconceived notions about what kind of person he is. Be sincere. You might need time, but the fact that you’re willing to change speaks volumes.

Free Advice On How To Get Your Ex Back - Getting Back Together With An Ex

If you are considering getting back together with an ex, there are several things you must know right now. This free advice on how to get your ex back is only the beginning, but can be a great help to you if you are trying to find your way. You should get confident in yourself, improve your self image by exercising and feeling better about yourself, and you should subtly remind your ex of past events that were fun.

One of the first things you should do when trying to get your ex back is to focus on yourself. This might sound silly or even counter intuitive, but the fact is that people love the fact that their partners are very confident in themselves. This exudes the role of an alpha male or alpha female. If you are not feeling very good about yourself, or sometimes find yourself saying things like "I can't do it", then it is time to change that attitude. You should instead tell yourself, "I can do anything if I put my mind to it." Get out there and start a workout plan. If you already have a workout plan, get more involved in it. Eat healthier and associate yourself with people who are like minded and feel the same way.

Improve your self image. When you look at yourself in the mirror, how do you see yourself? Are you taking good care of your hygiene? Do you keep your breath smelling fresh? Do you keep your nails cared for and face washed, and cleaned? How are your clothes? Are they relatively decent? If you feel you might need a makeover, keep in mind that you can do so, even if you are on a shoestring budget. There are plenty of places to go, even at your local shops that will allow you to look your best at a great discount. Your self image is so important because it not only has to do with how other people see you, it has to do with how you see yourself. Whether you see yourself as a winner or a loser, whether you see the glass as half empty or half full, or whether you see the relationship as salvageable or not salvageable will all depend on your view of yourself. So take good care of yourself starting today, and you will be happy you did so.

Little by little, you can remind your ex of past events that you both had fun together doing. For example, think of the place you had your first kiss and then say something like: "Hey, our youth club is going to have a barbeque down at the old park." That will invoke some great memories, and if you do that enough, they will eventually cave in and say, "Oh, yes, I remember that." and then they will eventually say "I miss that." Once they start having that attitude, you are well on your way on getting your ex back.

Fixing A Broken Relationship - Getting Back Together With An Ex

Getting back together with an ex requires fixing a broken relationship. Although this goes without saying, there are plenty of people who are willing to try to make it work without fixing the problems. The truth is that for a relationship to work, there has got to be some give and take from both partners. There has got to be some communication and some compromise. There has got to be actions from each person in addition to commitment to do those things. Moreover, there has got to be things you both can do together while getting council and advice from people who you know and trust.

Getting back together takes working together. That means that both of you have to decide upon fixing a broken relationship that existed previously. Commit to each other that you will have better communication. That means listening when the other person is talking and truly taking to heart what your partner is saying. Holding the same values of your partner is especially important in communication as well because you are more likely to listen to something that is important to you than something that is not important to you. Have a heart to heart talk with your partner about your relationship and humble yourself to the point where you do not argue or abrasively fight over some common misunderstandings. Listen to what your partner has to say with an open heart and open ears and then you will likely hear and catch something you haven't caught before. Perhaps you will get right down to the root of why you or your partner was behaving the way you behaved. And from this, you might be able to fix a broken relationship and make it into something that can grow and flourish.

There should be some things you and your partner should agree to do together to rekindle your romance an get back on the right track of a healthy relationship. In addition to doing things you both like, try thinking outside the box a little and you both take up a new hobby for a few weeks and see how it goes. Both of you may like it or both of you may not. The important part here is that you both experienced something together and you both decided on something together. That in itself is a powerful relationship builder because when it comes to harder problems, both of you will be more able to handle them.

Seek counseling and advice when fixing a broken relationship. Even if you both have already broken up, getting back together with an ex still calls for advice from either a spiritual adviser, parents, close friends, or someone you know and trust. Seek counseling together because if you two are to be in a relationship for the long term, then doing things together should be the norm. Take all these things into consideration when fixing a broken relationship because more than likely, this advice will need to be followed in order for it to work.

First Love Breakups - Getting Back Together With An Ex

One thing to note about first love breakups is that they are different than the rest. Many times it results in getting back together with an ex. But do not fear. There are other times where it ends in both of you going your separate ways for good. Either one of these scenarios is commonplace in our world. One thing to figure out in your break up is whether you both should still be friends afterwards. Another important thing to do is to figure out how you can cope with the break up. There are several ways of doing that too.

The main way first love breakups are different than all the rest is the realization that your first love isn't always your soul mate or the one you were destined to marry. This is also the time where both of you realize that everyone has gone through one of these before. Everyone's heart has been broken at some point or another. It is a part of life and we all go through it. The great part about this is that you can heal from it. Everybody can heal from it as long as they take it in stride and get through it with the help of other people who have been through the same thing. So, one of the first pieces of advice to follow is to open your heart and mind up to compassionate arms that want to comfort you and ears that want to empathize with what you have on your heart to say.

Now, whether you two should be friends afterwards is contingent on how comfortable you two are when it comes to seeing each other on a daily basis, especially with other people. The main test to see whether the two of you should remain friends afterwards is to see how either one of you would feel if one would see the other one with another romantic partner. If either one of you would feel jealousy after seeing the other person with someone else, then friendship after the break up is not for you. This is because jealousy destroys friendships.

There are several ways you can cope with the break up. Chances are you will be feeling sad and upset at the break up for a variety of reasons. The first thing you should do is talk to someone you know and trust. Try your brother or sister, mom or dad or spiritual leader at your local church. You can also try your closest friend.The least they will be able to do for you is to listen with an understanding ear, because after all, practically everyone has gone through a first love break up before. Once you get everything off your chest, start doing activities that are fun for you. You might even consider taking up a new hobby. You might find that one day either you will be getting back together with an ex or even moving on to find another person to spend your time with.

Ex Wants To Get Back Together - Getting Back Together With An Ex

So, your ex wants to get back together with you, right? There are several things to take into account when getting back together with an ex, namely the current state of both of your relationship status, the problems faced, and your level of commitment to making the whole thing work out. At the end of the day, it will be up to both of you as to whether you should get back together.

First and foremost, a decision to get back together is actually a decision by two people. You must decide to get back together with your ex, and your ex must decide to get back together with you. Once you both have reached that agreement, then you must talk about how it should happen. If either of you are currently seeing someone else right now, then that should end immediately. This should happen if both of you are positive that any changes to problems that rose in the past are being addressed and that you both are committed to a successful and loyal relationship.

Some of the problems faced in relationships are lack of trust, lack of communication, financial problems and values. Some of these are really hard topics for some people to find common ground on, but if your ex wants to get back together with you and is really showing some flexibility and compromise, then perhaps you should lend an ear. Lay everything out on the table as far as what is being done to fix the past problems. If there is a trust issue, figure out why the trust was broken and why it will not happen again. Provided the fact that there isn't a soul on this earth that has not worked for their trust, it is not unreasonable to accept the fact that either you will have to earn your exes trust back or your ex will have to earn your trust back. The fact remains that the trust must still be earned back. And until this happens, there has got to be patience, time and commitment to the furtherance of the relationship. But if both of you are strong, you will likely see it through.

If there was a money issue, figure out how the money is being fixed. Usually women like to feel secure. If they do not feel secure, then they will break up with their man. Women love a man who makes more money than she likes to spend. If he does not, then they might think he is cheap or cannot take care of his woman. All women are not like this, but many women in the western world hold this point of view. Figure out if your woman is like this. If she is, then be absolutely sure that there are other more important reasons why she wants to get back together with you, namely your character and  your love for her. That way, when times get tough, your partner will stick by you.

Ex Lover - Getting Back Together With An Ex

Getting back together with an ex lover can be a tricky situation, depending on what's going on. There are plenty of scenarios that might be at play here. Is your ex lover married and you two were having an affair? Was your ex lover single and now married? Or perhaps your ex lover is currently in a relationship with someone else and you want them back? Or maybe your ex lover is currently single. Even if they are single, are you single as well? Depending on the answers to these questions, there can be several things to do.

The fast answer would be that it is likely a great idea to get back with your ex lover provided you both are currently single and have amended any problems that may have arose between you two. But typically, it doesn't work out that way. If one partner tries to get back with their ex lover, there is usually a wild card in there such as one partner currently being in a relationship with another person. If this is the case, then the other partner would have to decide that they want you back as well. If they do want you back, then they will have to decide to break off their relationship with their other partner and then go back to you. If, however, you are in a relationship with another person, then you will have to decide to break it off with your current partner, provided that both you and your ex lover have strong feelings for each other again. This is all in the spirit of good communication.

Let's suppose that either one or both of you are willing to give up your current relationship with another partner to be with each other again. There must also be an understanding between both of you that the problems you both had in the last relationship are addressed and worked on. Both of you have got to be committed to working through your differences because the fact is that everybody is different and has differences. It's just a matter of working through them and finding a common ground. Both you and your ex lover should find a compromise before getting back together again. Each one of you is going to have to give a little and take a little in order to make it work again. Getting back together with an ex lover is no easy feat, but it can be easier than you think if you take these things into consideration.

Commitment and compromise go hand in hand, especially when getting back together with an ex lover. If your partner is to give a little, then expect to give a little yourself. From this, it is only reasonable that both of you will have to sacrifice something to make the other satisfied. Even if it comes to monetary situations, emotional, familial, spiritual or other needs, there are several areas both of you can get common ground on in order to move forward in the relationship.

Ex Husband - Getting Back Together With An Ex

Ending a marriage can be a horrible and messy ordeal, but there are plenty of statistics available that show that a good percentage of couples eventually get back together again. Let this be a good sign to you if either you are considering getting back together with an ex husband or your ex husband is considering getting back together with you. There can be benefits and drawbacks to both, and at the end of the day, both of you will have to decide what is right for you.

Right off the bat, there are things that both of you should consider when deciding whether to get back together again. This namely has to do with children, especially when there were problems in the relationship that were affecting the children in adverse ways. Physical and emotional abuse are driving factors that separate husbands, wives and children. As you are probably already aware, getting back together will have to herald an end to this abuse. This can be a staggering feat for a couple, but not impossible. If there is help from the community, spiritually and from the family, there can be a positive change. Consider some conditional time back together before you rekindle the marriage. See how that goes for a little while to see how serious each of you are with the relationship.

Sometimes your ex husband can decide to get back with you if either one or both of you decided to open your heart up to trust the other person again. This is a personal choice that you and your partner should make about each other. No person exactly the same as another person. If both of you can come to a mutual understanding that neither one of you will see anyone else anymore, then there might likely be some great possibilities to rekindle the marriage between you two. It is widely known that trust takes much time to earn, but is so easily lost. That is why the turning point of a relationship happens for the better when both hearts open up to the possibility of being able to trust the other partner again. This new found trust would amount to a drastic change in behavior and even a fundamental change in values of your partner. They truly might be turning a new leaf and are willing to show you that there is absolute desire to be loyal.

Another reason you can get back with your ex husband is if both of your values start to match up. If your husband believed in something different than you did and either you or he changed the belief system to match the other partner, then there might be a possibility to get back on the right track. Sit down and talk with your ex husband. Go over what went wrong and what has changed since then. See if you two can work something out, and perhaps both of you can happen upon a solution that will allow you both to become married again.

Breaking Up Getting Back Together

If you are considering breaking up and getting back together, or have already done so, there are a few things you should know about this course of action. You should note the reasons you both are breaking up, ask yourself what it would be like if you got back together with your partner, determine if you and your partner has corrected or is at least working on the mistakes that caused the breaking up, and consider the repercussions of taking off too soon.

There are several reasons why couples break up, most notably that of emotional, physical and mental abuse, financial issues, lack of communication, and lack of trust. If you or your partner was performing physical, emotional or mental abuse, then you have to seriously ask yourself if it is worth getting back together after breaking up. Do you or your partner continue to put each other down or put other people down? Do either of you criticize each other or other people without advancing practical solutions? If you continue to do so, then that is probably why you are breaking up, and it will likely be a determining factor that will stop you from getting back together in a fulfilling relationship.

If there are financial issues at stake, then it is still possible to make it work between you two. If you two love each other, then it is conceivable that you can work through your financial difficulties. If you or your partner need to spend a few extra hours each day working, don't necessarily let that be an excuse for you to break up. Instead, try to schedule some time where you can see each other after work. When you do spend time with each other, value it and treat it as top quality time. More importantly, if you both are committed to securing a good financial future for yourself, don't lose faith in your partner's ability to bring in more money. Instead of criticizing, do all you can to help encourage better ways to make it possible.

If you and your partner are considering getting back together, try and determine if you and your partner has corrected or is at least working on fixing the mistakes that caused the breaking up in the first place. It takes a team of two working together to move forward. Think about the potato sack race you might have done when you were a child. You could never say to your partner "I will jump when you jump" because then both of you will fall. Both of you have to jump together. With that said, consider the pros and cons of getting back together and when you have, then make a decision for yourself.