Why Am I Still In Love - My Ex May Not Love Me

Falling in love is a funny thing. Sometimes it seems to happen in an instant, other times it takes longer, and other times you don't even realize just how much in love you were until after you have both gone your separate ways. If the last one sounds familiar then you may be asking, "why am I still in love with my ex?" There isn't an easy answer to that question, but let's take a look at some things you should consider.

A good first step is to change the question you are asking yourself. Instead of asking why you are still in love with your ex, ask yourself if you are really in love with them or not. What may be happening is that you are missing the relationship itself, and not the person you were with. There is something comforting about being in a routine. Once that routine comes to an end it causes a lot of stress. That stress isn't what causes the feelings of affection, but stress makes it easy to incorrectly identify what your real feelings are. So, take the time to figure out what you're really feeling before making any assumptions.

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Assuming you have determined that you do, indeed, still love your ex then you should know that you are not alone. As mentioned earlier, falling in love is a funny thing. It is very rare that both people in a relationship fall in love with each other at the exact same time; one or the other will feel love first. The same is true of falling out of love. While your ex may have fallen out of love with you, you still have strong feelings for them.

At this point you have two options. You can either hope that your ex will fall back in love with you, or you can try to stop loving your ex. Only you know which one is the best solution for you and your situation. Be careful here! Your first reaction will be to answer quickly, but that's a mistake. Take the time to reflect on the answer. Consider your motivations behind the answer. Do your best to be honest with yourself and what's really going on.

If you finally decide it will be best to try to patch things up and have your ex fall in love with you again, then you need to be prepared to take the needed steps to make that happen. Remember, your ex will change their feelings at a different pace than you will. This means you need to give them the time they need to give the relationship another chance.

On the other hand, if you decide it's best to move on and let your feelings fade for your ex, then you need to start doing so as soon as you can. The quicker you can get over these feelings and move on, the better. That way, the next time you find that you're asking yourself, "why am I still in love with my ex?", you can answer by saying, "I'm not. I have moved on to a brighter and better future!"

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How To Get Over Someone You Love - Time Helps

Going through a breakup is never an enjoyable experience. It doesn't matter which side of the break up you're on, and it doesn't matter how amicable it seemed to be; it's still a relationship coming to an end. No matter how long you were together, you had time to build up real feelings for the other person, and now you want to know how to get over someone you still love. I'm going to be honest, it won't always be easy, but it is possible.

Before we start looking at the specific steps you can take to get over someone after a break up, let's take a look at why that's so important to do. It's important because you are going to have to move on. You will eventually meet somebody new (or maybe you have already). The new person in your life deserves your full affections and shouldn't have to compete with the feelings you have for someone else. Okay, now on to ways to get over your ex.

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The first thing to do is think about any of the times you were treated poorly. Did your ex ever put you down? Did they ever intentionally ignore your thoughts or feelings? Were they abusive? This step can be painful, but the goal is to show yourself that they maybe didn't love you as much as you thought they did. This makes it easier to stop feeling as though they should be loved back.

You also need to give things some time. The more time that passes after your break up, the less affection you should be feeling. Unfortunately, sometimes the opposite is true. It seems that the longer we are separated, the stronger our love for the other person becomes. Don't let that happen to you.

Another thing that will help to answer the question of how to get over someone you still love is to accept that it's over. Your ex has already moved on. What you had may have been special, but there will be somebody else who will be even more special. Living in a fantasy world where your ex and you will be happy again isn't going to help get your feelings back in check. Therefore, it's best to accept reality and move ahead with your life.

Refocusing is another method of getting over an ex. People’s emotions can run high after a break up. This can actually amplify your feelings of love. The problem is that they are focused on the wrong person. So, if you can change the target of your affection, it will help you to get over the other person.

How to get over someone you still love is not always the easiest thing to do, no question. Relationships are complicated, and getting over them takes time. However, by following the tips above, you will soon be over your ex and be able to start living your life. After all, no matter what has happened in the past, you still deserve to be happy.

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Avoiding Scams in search of love

The Internet can be a place where you find true love. But if you create a profile on a dating site, it is very important for you to keep your eyes open. You risk being tied to a subscription that you may find it hard to get out of again.

Read The Sites Terms of Use

It is important that you read the dating site's terms carefully before you create a subscription.

Examine among other things, how long you lock yourself into that particular dating service. You should be certain to Double Check for a cancellation clause. Some of the places you can find the cancellation clause may be varied and difficult to see.

It could be buried in the "Terms of Use" page, it could be hidden under the purchase button in a very light shade of grey or even in the confirmation e-Mail you receive. However you should find that the vast majority of legitimate on line dating sites will make this information very easy to find.

Warning:

If you can not find clear and adequate information on the time period, the price and the cancellation notice period, be careful not to join the site.

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Check others' experiences with the site

It's also a good idea to check online whether other users have good or bad experiences with the site.

Consumer advocates, various State and country agencies, including State and Country Attorney Generals, have received complaints from consumers who have reported that after creating a free profile, on a dating site, they must upgrade to a paid membership to read messages from other users. In many cases these messages are auto-generated and or tailored to match what the consumer was looking for when meeting another member.

However, by reading the auto-generated messages, on the site, while thinking it was free, the consumer was automatically upgraded to a paying membership or was told to upgrade to read the messages. And when they did they were locked into a long term membership.

Once this was done, they found it extremely difficult to get out of the subscription when trying to cancel and get their money back. There have also been examples of the profile suddenly appearing on multiple sites because the owner of the site for marketing purposes has several sites with different names.

Cancellation and Refunds

Depending on the dating site, you basically have from 14 to 30 days to cancel, when you subscribe on the web or your mobile phone. In other words you can cancel the service anytime during the time period. However, as stated above you may find your self being charged for a full month, if you read the site's messages to you. So be careful! read the entire "terms of use" and know what it is going on

Create a free profile on a dating site, you may find that you need to upgrade to a paid membership to read messages from other users, and it also means that you waive the opportunity to withdraw from the contract. Always read the terms carefully before you upgrade your membership.

Rights to images

Please also note that if you give the rights to the images/pictures you upload to your profile, you may run the risk of giving, that dating site, to use the images in their marketing.

Avoiding scams in search of love isn't difficult. You just need to make sure you read the terms of use and know what you are signing up for and the permissions you are giving to the dating site.

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3 Tips About A Boyfriend Break Up

Did you wake up this morning with a devastating heart ache? Perhaps you're experiencing a monumental "hangover" headache and you don't even drink. Did you dread looking in the mirror, because you know what you're going to look like? There is a very good chance you have if you have ever had a boyfriend break up.

Frankly there are many things in your relationship that could have brought forth the breakup. However, you and I are going to concentrate on just three of them today.

1. Cheating with another woman:

Are you even sure you know what cheating is or what it actually involves? When you set down and began to examine the event that brought about the ending of the relationship, there are several question to ask yourself.

Was he texting a female you didn't know about? If so was it someone at work and the text involved work. That could be a legitimate and perfectly innocent relationship and does not even qualify as cheating.

Does it mean he was having an ongoing sexual relationship with someone from his past? Yes! That definitely is out and out cheating on your relationship. Are you so jealous that when he even glances at another woman, you expect he is cheating on you?

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As you can see there are many definitions for cheating. Therefore you need to be perfectly clear in your mind what your definition is about cheating prior to breaking up with your boyfriend.

Now I'm going to throw a little curve at you from out of nowhere. Prior to starting your "steady" relationship, did you and he talk about what each of you expected in your romance?

You may be really surprised by his explanation when you do the boyfriend breakup thing, when he just looked at another woman or was texting someone at work. When this happens you may need to decide if your expectations were out of the so called norm. One thing about it though, is when you really think about it you may have to decide if you want to breakup with the boyfriend or continue with the overall realationship.

2.Long distance love affairs:

You can almost bet when your trying to maintain a long distance relationship it is painful, extremely difficult and almost always ends in a boyfriend breakup; unless both of you are fully committed to making it work. If your not committed get prepared because the breakup is likely going to be just around the corner.

It is very likely you have seen more than one person experience this phenomenon.It really seems to be prevalent in the college age young people. Many of them had relationships in high school that carried forward into the early college years. However, when the schools were hours or miles apart and studies, social events and loneliness cuts in the boyfriend break up can occur.  

3. Lifestyle changes:

What if your beau has become a real pain in the butt? It just might be the perfect time to change your life. Even though the boyfriend doesn't want to break up you may have to be the one, who takes the bull by the horns, and does the breaking up.

Oftentimes as you mature and put on a few more years your thinking, goals and social approaches may change and often do. You may just be finding yourself not even wanting a permanent partner. And frankly there is nothing wrong with spreading your social wings.

Take the time to dig into your heart, mind and soul to see if the boyfriend breakup maybe exactly what you need right now. Yes both you and your significant other may hurt when the breakup takes place, but both of you maybe made of some very strong stuff and find out it's the best thing that ever happened to you.

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Don't Judge a Woman by Her Looks!

I know this tip may sound very cliche, but it's true. At some point or another we're all guilty of judging something, or someone, based on appearance alone. While it's not right, we still seem to have that tendency to be superficial. This type of behavior can be very detrimental when it comes to seducing a woman. Women like to be appreciated for who they are, not what they look like. Even those women who have great physical beauty don't necessarily want to be judged on that characteristic alone.

Women keep the thought in the back of their mind that one day they may want to have a child. If and when they become pregnant, look at all the changes their body goes through. The mere fact that their body has to expand at a very rapid pace to accommodate the growth of the baby is frightening. And the knowledge that their figure may never be the same is equally frightening.

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Another thought that women have is that eventually we all get older and less youthful in appearance. We know that in general, a man is considered more distinguished looking when his hair takes on the salt and pepper look, whereas women merely look old. A few wrinkles on a man are no big deal, but for women the first sign of a wrinkle is cause to consider bo-tox treatment, or more. Society has made women terribly self conscious. Bear in mind when considering what you truly believe is important in a woman. If looks is top on your list it will surely lead to a very dissatisfying experience for you, and your woman.

Let me give you a live example of having looks at the top of your list of qualities, a woman must have. My son's first wife was a beautiful young woman on the outside, but lacked certain traits on the inside that my son was looking for. Within a few short months the lack of these traits began to have an impact on their marriage. And the longer the marriage went on the harder the marriage came for both of them. Unfortunately within less than two years they divorced. Thank goodness there were no children involved.

Two years later my son married a woman who had a more normal physical appearance. However, she had an overabundance of "beautiful traits" on the inside. It quickly became apparent in their marriage that they were very compatible and were happy together.

I'm not trying to say that you have to resolve to be happy with someone you find utterly unattractive. Women all have preferences in looks, personality and many other traits that we have to abide by. It's a matter of compatibility. But what women do have to take into consideration is that attraction is not just a matter of physical appearance. So take the time to find out what's inside before you discount women based on what's outside.

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Don't Just SAY You're Sorry – Prove It

The words, "I'm sorry" can get us out of trouble when we've done something wrong or hurt someone we care about but the key to a good apology is really meaning it and convincing the other person that you are truly remorseful.  Apologizing just for the sake of keeping the peace is not an effective way to apologize.  In doing so the recipient of the apology will most likely see through you and realize that your apology is insincere.  A sincere and well timed apology, however, will help to mend the relationship that was harmed by your words or actions. 

The most important way to prove that you are truly sorry for hurting someone is to ensure that the hurtful action is not repeated.  Apologizing over and over while continuing to make the same mistake shows that your apology is not really sincere.  On the other hand if you really mean that you are sorry for an action you will take careful steps not to repeat this action.  Apologizing for your actions is one thing but being cautious not to repeat your actions really proves that you are indeed sorry.  

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Being specific regarding the reason for your apology also really proves that you are sorry.  Many people are quick to offer an apology when they realize someone is upset with them but often they don’t take the time to figure out why the other person is upset.  Apologizing without stating the reason for the apology shows that you don’t understand the problem and that you aren’t sincere in your apology.  This is not an effective way to make an apology.  However, if you offer a specific reason for your apology you are proving that you understand what you did to hurt the other person and that do not want to repeat that action. 

Another way to prove that your apology is authentic is to be sure to offer the apology in person.  Having a third party speak to the person you have offended or apologizing via email or voice mail conveys a lack of caring.  This kind of apology shows that you aren't truly sorry for your actions.  Meeting with the person face to face to have a sincere conversation and offer your apology is one way to really prove that you are sorry.  It shows that you care enough about the other person to meet with them directly to try to make amends for your contributions to the disagreement. 

In apologizing, if you want to prove that you really mean it, be careful not to place blame on the person you are apologizing to.  Your apology is about telling the other person why you believe that you did something wrong.  While they may have contributed to the situation, now is not the time to point out their faults.  Instead take full responsibility for what you have done wrong.  Accepting full responsibility for your actions and apologizing for them without placing blame on the other person will prove that your apology is sincere. 

A genuine apology will also include telling the other person why your actions were wrong and how you intend to avoid hurting them in the future.  Doing this proves to them not only that you understand you were wrong but that you understand why you were wrong.  It also lets them know that you have already formulated a plan of action to ensure that this situation does not arise in the future. 

The timing of your apology can also help to prove that you really are sorry.  Waiting too long to apologize may show that you don't really care and that you are simply apologizing as an afterthought.  An apology that is made too early may risk being ignored because the recipient of the apology is still too upset to listen to what you are saying. 

It's important to give the other person a chance to vent their anger and calm down before rushing to apologize.  After a reasonable amount of time approach them and let them know that you understand their anger and believe that it is justified and that you wanted to give them a chance to calm down before apologizing. 

Sometimes it is not enough to simply apologize for your words or actions.  It is often necessary to not only apologize but to also prove that your apology is sincere.  A truly sincere apology proves that you are sorry by addressing the issue and acknowledging what you have done wrong while validating the other person’s right to be angry and addressing how you will avoid similar actions in the future.

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5 Dating Etiquette Tips For A Comfortable Date

1. Be Yourself:

When you go on a date there are certain things and ways you should behave. Of course you want the person to get to know you so you shouldn't try and be someone that you are not. This is extremely important and should be your number one priority.

Simply ask yourself this question, "Do I really want to start this date off with a lie or being someone I'm not?" Always remember either situation can come back to bite you later. Especially if you find out this is someone you would really like to have a meaningful relationship with.

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2. Personal Appearance:

When you go out on a date you should look and dress nice. Make an effort to dress appropriately for the type of date you're going on. This will show the other person you care about your appearance but you also care about what they think about you. If you don't care about what the
other person thinks then you probably shouldn't be going out on a date with them in the first place.

3. Prior To The Date:

Depending on the person you are taking out you should also remember to open the car doors and all doors for your date.

If the woman you are going out with is a feminist, then let her open the doors and do things for herself or it will bother her. She also will want to pay for her own meal.

If you are not going on a date with an independent woman who is a feminist then you should open the doors, be on time when you pick her up, and be prepared to pay for the entire date.

4. Can you afford the date:

As you well know in today's economy many prices have gone up,  in restaurants, places of entertainment and especially night clubs and bars. Don't take your date somewhere you cannot afford and never find yourself asking your date for money to cover the bill. This may well put you into the most embarrassing spot you have ever been. Think about this? What if your date only had a few dollars for an emergency?

And suddenly you find yourself and your date explaining to a police officer why you were trying to stiff the restaurant or place of entertainment. In some cities and towns you can be charged with a misdemeanor or even higher. To avoid this situation simply take a few minutes to call the places where you are planning on taking your date.

5. Asking Your Date Questions:

Dating etiquette also includes not making the other person feel as if they are on an interview. It is common for people on a date to ask many questions as they just want to get to know the other person.
However, don't make them feel as if they are on an interview or you might scare them off. Be sure to create a comfortable atmosphere.

In conclusion dating etiquette can make the difference if the date is a fun and exciting date or a complete dud. The majority of the time you won't  have to think about it, as you will just do it naturally.

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