4 Stages of Emotions Following a Break Up

Love is such an amazing emotion that makes life meaningful and happy.  When you are in a loving relationship you are on top of the world and going through the happiest time of your life.  But what if that relationship turns sour?  Unfortunately, even the best of relationships will have some issues and if they aren't resolved they can lead to the end of the relationship.  A person can go from being on top of the world to being on the bottom of the earth when their relationship reaches break up point.

When your relationship breaks up your heart is broken and the pain you feel is incredibly sharp and real.  Everyone reacts differently to relationship break ups and some will cope better than others.  Here are the general stages that one will experience when going through a relationship break up.

Stage One:  When your relationship comes to an end you will feel shock.  If you knew there was trouble and a break up was heading your way then the shock might not be as great, but there will still be some degree of shock.  If you were still happy in the relationship but your partner ended it out of the blue, then the shock you will feel will be very strong.

Stage Two:  The second stage of a break up is when you refuse to believe that the relationship is over.  Perhaps you have been in denial that there have been any problems occurring within your relationship and don't want to accept that the relationship is now over.  You might try to convince yourself that it is just a temporary setback that you will be able to resolve.  Unfortunately, if your partner has broken off the relationship then it might be too late to resolve any problems that have been building up over time.

Stage Three:  Next you might begin to experience some depression.  Feeling depressed is a completely normal reaction following a relationship break up.  No-one enjoys ending a relationship and even if you are the partner that chose to end the relationship you will still experience sadness at the end of this major stage of your life.  It is best to try and move on and keep yourself busy so you don't spend all your time thinking about it.

Stage Four:  The last stage of emotions following a break up is acceptance.  Although it can take time to reach this stage, once you accept that the relationship is over then you can move on with your life.  Be happy that you were able to experience a loving relationship for a short time and put the relationship and the break up down to experience.  This whole experience will make you stronger and help you grow into the person you are today.  Once you have accepted that the relationship is over then you can move on and be open to meeting someone new.

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Ending a Relationship is Never Easy

Ending a relationship can be really difficult and you don't want it to be any more upsetting than necessary.  If you are considering ending a relationship you might be contemplating the best way to do it, but is there really a right way?

Ideally it would be good to end a relationship on good terms and without too much drama and pain.  Unfortunately the ideal ending to a relationship doesn't happen very often, but instead relationships often end in a bad way leaving behind feelings of anger and sadness.  When the break up is drawn out and messy it can leave both parties furious at each other and very bitter.

If you know in your heart that your relationship is over and are just trying to find the right way to end it, then keep in mind that this person is one that you have loved and has shared a big part of your life.  Find the right time to talk to your partner openly and honestly and let them know exactly how you feel.  Let her know your true feelings but don't go blaming her for anything, as soon as you start the blame game that is when it can turn nasty.

If the breakup comes as a shock to your ex then she will have a thousand questions running through her mind, so the more that you can explain to her the better.  By explaining your feelings and your decision to your partner then it will also help you to know in your own mind that you are making the right decision.  If you have been in the relationship for a long time then you really do want to take the time to break it to her gently and not just walk out leaving her wondering what happened.

You never know if you sit down and talk about how you are feeling you might even come up with another solution rather than just ending the relationship completely.  Perhaps you can spend some time apart to think things through and evaluate your situation before making a final decision one way or the other.

Or course this advice above is based on a relationship that has been reasonably happy.  For example, things will be a bit different if you are ending a relationship because your partner is abusive.  If you make the decision to end a relationship that is abusive then it is usually best that you leave the relationship as soon as you can.  Some relationships can be so abusive that a person is too scared to leave for fear that their partner will find them, so you will need to plan your departure carefully and you may need to seek help.

Even if you are the person ending the relationship, you can still feel sadness and loneliness when it is over.  Just remember, that when one door closes another door opens and although the end of a relationship is a sad time, you are now beginning the rest of your life, so enjoy every minute of it.

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Advice on How to Effortlessly Save Your Relationship

Relationships always start off happy and full of excitement and there is no better feeling than that ‘new relationship’ feeling.  Your first fight is terrible because it recognizes a sign of maturity in a relationship and that new feeling is fading.  Then if you start to feel that your relationship is in trouble; that can just be absolutely devastating.

As soon as you start seeing some signs of trouble in your relationship you can start to panic and might even start acting and thinking irrationally – which really doesn’t help the situation one bit.  How you act now can make or break your relationship so if you really want to save this amazing relationship then the following tips might be useful to you.

What is the Problem in the Relationship?

The first step to saving a relationship is to identify the cause of the problems that you are having.  All relationships will have some problems but some problems are worse than others and these problems are the ones that can break a relationship if they aren’t resolved.  Even the small issues are worth working at getting resolved as even though they are small, they can build up over time and become the cause of a failed relationship.  So to save your relationship and your love for your partner, it is important to identify any problems and work through them together.

Talk to Your Partner about the Problem.

A relationship is a two person journey and you can’t solve all problems on your own.  So if there is a problem in your relationship you will need to sit down with your partner and discuss it, don’t just try to resolve the issue yourself.  By talking about any problems that you have then you can both work toward solving the problem and saving your relationship.

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Do You and Your Partner Still Love Each Other?

A relationship won’t work without love to hold it together and sometimes people just fall out of love.  Love is a very powerful tool and if you both still love each other then you should be able to use that tool to save your relationship.  If your love for each other has died off then it may be time to say goodbye, but if there is still a glimmer of love then your relationship has hope.

It is possible to save a relationship that has problems if you can keep the above tips in mind.  Love is a two way street and you both need to feel love toward each other and be committed to saving your relationship.  If your partner doesn’t want to be in the relationship at all then you can’t force him to stay, but if he does still love you then there will always be hope.  Stay calm, look at the problems rationally and work them out together.

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Why Am I Still In Love - My Ex May Not Love Me

Falling in love is a funny thing. Sometimes it seems to happen in an instant, other times it takes longer, and other times you don't even realize just how much in love you were until after you have both gone your separate ways. If the last one sounds familiar then you may be asking, "why am I still in love with my ex?" There isn't an easy answer to that question, but let's take a look at some things you should consider.

A good first step is to change the question you are asking yourself. Instead of asking why you are still in love with your ex, ask yourself if you are really in love with them or not. What may be happening is that you are missing the relationship itself, and not the person you were with. There is something comforting about being in a routine. Once that routine comes to an end it causes a lot of stress. That stress isn't what causes the feelings of affection, but stress makes it easy to incorrectly identify what your real feelings are. So, take the time to figure out what you're really feeling before making any assumptions.

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Assuming you have determined that you do, indeed, still love your ex then you should know that you are not alone. As mentioned earlier, falling in love is a funny thing. It is very rare that both people in a relationship fall in love with each other at the exact same time; one or the other will feel love first. The same is true of falling out of love. While your ex may have fallen out of love with you, you still have strong feelings for them.

At this point you have two options. You can either hope that your ex will fall back in love with you, or you can try to stop loving your ex. Only you know which one is the best solution for you and your situation. Be careful here! Your first reaction will be to answer quickly, but that's a mistake. Take the time to reflect on the answer. Consider your motivations behind the answer. Do your best to be honest with yourself and what's really going on.

If you finally decide it will be best to try to patch things up and have your ex fall in love with you again, then you need to be prepared to take the needed steps to make that happen. Remember, your ex will change their feelings at a different pace than you will. This means you need to give them the time they need to give the relationship another chance.

On the other hand, if you decide it's best to move on and let your feelings fade for your ex, then you need to start doing so as soon as you can. The quicker you can get over these feelings and move on, the better. That way, the next time you find that you're asking yourself, "why am I still in love with my ex?", you can answer by saying, "I'm not. I have moved on to a brighter and better future!"

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How To Get Over Someone You Love - Time Helps

Going through a breakup is never an enjoyable experience. It doesn't matter which side of the break up you're on, and it doesn't matter how amicable it seemed to be; it's still a relationship coming to an end. No matter how long you were together, you had time to build up real feelings for the other person, and now you want to know how to get over someone you still love. I'm going to be honest, it won't always be easy, but it is possible.

Before we start looking at the specific steps you can take to get over someone after a break up, let's take a look at why that's so important to do. It's important because you are going to have to move on. You will eventually meet somebody new (or maybe you have already). The new person in your life deserves your full affections and shouldn't have to compete with the feelings you have for someone else. Okay, now on to ways to get over your ex.

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The first thing to do is think about any of the times you were treated poorly. Did your ex ever put you down? Did they ever intentionally ignore your thoughts or feelings? Were they abusive? This step can be painful, but the goal is to show yourself that they maybe didn't love you as much as you thought they did. This makes it easier to stop feeling as though they should be loved back.

You also need to give things some time. The more time that passes after your break up, the less affection you should be feeling. Unfortunately, sometimes the opposite is true. It seems that the longer we are separated, the stronger our love for the other person becomes. Don't let that happen to you.

Another thing that will help to answer the question of how to get over someone you still love is to accept that it's over. Your ex has already moved on. What you had may have been special, but there will be somebody else who will be even more special. Living in a fantasy world where your ex and you will be happy again isn't going to help get your feelings back in check. Therefore, it's best to accept reality and move ahead with your life.

Refocusing is another method of getting over an ex. People’s emotions can run high after a break up. This can actually amplify your feelings of love. The problem is that they are focused on the wrong person. So, if you can change the target of your affection, it will help you to get over the other person.

How to get over someone you still love is not always the easiest thing to do, no question. Relationships are complicated, and getting over them takes time. However, by following the tips above, you will soon be over your ex and be able to start living your life. After all, no matter what has happened in the past, you still deserve to be happy.

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Getting Beyond He Said-She Said

The term, "He said/she said" is often heard in the unfortunate case of rape.  In this situation the term applies to the fact that when there is little factual evidence on which to base a decision the jury is left trying to determine who's story they believe and the case becomes one of her word against his.  These cases perhaps illustrate the problems regarding he said/she said that couples are faced with in a relationship.  

Beyond the fact that in a rape case one or both of the parties may not be telling the truth, exists the underlying problem that men and women think and process information differently. The differences between male and female gender include differences in thought process, sensitivity, memory, and communication.  A successful relationship is one that recognizes the difference between men and women and is able to get beyond the he said/she said scenarios.  

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Men and women have a different thought process when it comes to solving problems.  While both sexes are capable of solving problems equally well the thought process involved in coming to a resolution varies between them. For men a problem is an opportunity for them to demonstrate their problem solving skills in a quick and efficient manner.  Men see having the problem solved as the ultimate goal and they believe that the best solution is the one that is quickest and most efficient. 

Women on the other hand see a problem as an opportunity to work together and reach a resolution.  Women relish the chance to communicate about the problem and the act of working together to solve the problem is more important than actually solving the problem.  Women may feel closer to their partner, even if the problem still exists, if she feels that the resolution process drew them closer together.  Understanding that women and men view the problem solving process differently will help a relationship to prosper. 

Sensitivity is another area where ladies and gentlemen differ.  Women have a heightened sense of sensitivity relative to men. This heightened sensitivity results in women being more prone to act on their emotions rather than on rational thought. A woman’s sensitivity allows her to understand her own feelings as well as those of others better so her reactions tend to take feelings into consideration above logic. 

However, men do not have the same level of sensitivity and therefore are more likely to make their decisions based solely on logic and not take feelings and emotions into consideration.  This disparity can result in problems during a relationship because the woman assumes that the man intentionally tried to hurt their feelings if they make a decision that has this effect while the man may grow frustrated if he believes the woman made an irrational decision.  Realizing that this difference exists will help a couple to get beyond he said/she said. 

Men and Women also differ in terms of memory.  Men have a memory that is stronger in situations where they can recall the details of an event by making an association with something concrete such as a location or item.  For example men are more apt to remember an event that took place in a location that they are able to visualize well. 

Women on the other hand have a memory that is stronger when they are able to associate the emotions felt with that memory to other memories where they had similar emotions.  This type of memory is especially problematic because when a women becomes angry with her partner, she is often able to recall other situations where he has angered her. Unless the difference in memory is recognized it can become a source of frustration in a relationship when the man and woman don't understand why their partner doesn’t remember something that is so vivid to them. 

Men and Women also often have different communication styles which can complicate a relationship.  Men tend to be more introspective about their problems and choose to deal with them internally and without discussing them with their partner.  When they do decide to discuss a problem it's usually after much thought and careful consideration.  Women on the other hand enjoy conversing about their problems with their partner and believe that doing so helps them to understand their problem better and come to a solution more easily.  Women often use communication as a method for reaching a conclusion.  They view the discussion as a way to figure out a solution.  The he said/she said aspects of communications must be understood to avoid frustration and disappointment in a relationship.

Men and women have different styles when it comes to problem solving, sensitivity, memory and communication in a relationship.  Careful observance and understanding of these differences is necessary for a relationship to flourish.  Understanding these he said/she said principals and being willing to get beyond them will help to minimize difficulties in a relationship; in regards to gender differences.

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Where To Get Breakup Advice

When you’re ending a relationship, it can help to get breakup advice from people who’ve been where you are. You might talk to a relative, friends, people you trust, or you might look for breakup advice online.

There are probably thousands of websites out there telling you how to break up with someone, how to handle the separation and how to move forward. But some of the advice you’ll find can actually make the bad things you’re feeling even worse.

First, you’ll find sites that are designed to convince you that you don’t really want to break up with your ex. There are number of books available on the subject. Look at your local library or bookstore and you’ll see probably a dozen books or more telling you how you can save the relationship.

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That’s all great, if you really do want to save a relationship. There might be advice in those books and on those websites that can help you heal as a couple. The thing to watch for is breakup advice that makes you change your mind from wanting to move on to wanting to make it work, all designed to sell you an ebook or a regular book on just how to do it.

Remember that no matter how tempting the pitch is, you went looking for advice on how to move on. Not on how to go back into a situation you’ve just gotten away from. Avoid reading sites and books like that unless you’re really unsure you’ve made the right decision.

Then there are sites that will encourage you to move on too quickly. Often, these are designed to get you to sign up for a dating service! Think carefully. Do you really need breakup advice telling you to forget the time you’ve had with your ex by quickly getting back into the dating scene?

The point is that much of the advice out there is designed to sell you something that you probably don’t need. It’s a good idea to look for advice online. Just be sure that you can recognize the obvious pitches and sort the real advice from things just designed to sell you a product.

Most really good help online can be found at websites of relationship experts and people with education in human relations. They might have an ebook or book to sell, too. But they have experience counseling people and have credentials to show they know what they’re talking about.

Your closest friends can be a good source of advice, as long as they are supportive of you and don’t have any kind of attitudes about your ex-relationship. When you’re ending a relationship, it’s hard enough to deal with without good friends telling you “I told you so” or about what a loser the person was anyway.

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Talk to friends who respect what you’re going through and don’t just start putting down your ex. The best breakup advice will come from people who only want to see you happy again.

Signs Of Cheating Boyfriend What To Look For

The signs of cheating boyfriend are different in every case. Some are very subtle signs that you might already be seeing but not really noticing. And in some cases, the signs are very clear to everyone but you. That’s because some signs of cheating boyfriend are what is called “hidden in plain sight.”

Does your boyfriend get lots of cell phone calls that he steps into another room to take?  You might not think this is one of the signs of cheating boyfriend, so you might have never paid much attention before. This is one of those “in plain sight” signs.

A boyfriend who gets lots of phone calls isn’t necessarily a cheating boyfriend. Maybe he just feels it’s rude to have a cell phone conversation in front of other people. Find out if he leaves the room when you call him, or if he talks to you no matter who’s around without taking it in private, if you can.

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Leaving the room in itself isn’t always a sign. But notice if he’s secretive about the conversation. Does he tell you who it was sometimes? If you ask who called does he tell you without hesitation or does he get defensive? How he handles questions can be one of the signs of cheating boyfriend.

When he’s out without you, does he ever mention what he did?  Is he all right with you asking (politely, not with an accusing tone) of who he might have been with and what they did?  Most people who get defensive about these kinds of questions fall into three groups.
 

• They’re defensive because they have something to hide. 
• They’re defensive because they don’t like to be asked as if they were doing something wrong. 
• They don’t like being asked AND they have something to hide.

If you’re asking nicely and not drilling him, he shouldn’t have any problem answering your questions unless he has something to hide. He should actually want to answer you to put your mind at ease that nothing has gone on.

Some cheating signs are even more subtle. Does he try to keep you far away from his friends? Some guys manage that by having their time with their buddies and their time from you as separate. And often it’s played up to be for you, so you can spend time with him alone.

But if he really makes an effort to keep you away from his friends, you have to wonder why. If he’s cheating, he’s probably not worried about his friends spilling the beans. They’re his friends, after all, and would have no reason to tell you what he’s doing.

But he might be worried that if they act strangely around you because of that, you might pick up on it. Insider remarks and jokes that they think you won’t get could be something to tell you something’s wrong here.

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Whether or not he takes you around his friends in that case could be one of the signs of cheating boyfriend.

Top Four Ways To Get Lover Back

If you’re dealing with a breakup right after the holidays, undoubtedly one of the main things on your mind is how to get lover back. While it may seem impossible, there is good news! Even if you think that all hope is lost, there are proven ways that have helped thousands of people reunite with their lost loves and even improve their relationships so that they never have to go through the pain of a breakup again.

If you’re ready to try to get lover back, here are four easy steps that you can put into motion that will help you achieve your goals. While every person’s situation will be different, these four proven methods will get you started on reconciliation and will help smooth the road back to togetherness. Even if you think the relationship is past fixing, thousands of people just like you have utilized these tips to achieve happiness.

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Tip #1 - Leave the Past Behind – One of the biggest obstacles that most people face when they want to get lover back is that they cannot leave the past behind. If you want to forge ahead and start over, this is the first step you’re going to have to take. That means forgiveness, and while it’s not the easiest thing to do, if you can accomplish this step, the rest will be a breeze.

Tip #2 – Make the First Move – If you are waiting for your ex to come crawling back, you may end up waiting a long time. Sometimes, you need to take that initiative, even if you are not sure that it will end up in your favor. Most times, a broken relationship can be easily fixed if at least one person can make that first move and say those three little words, “I am sorry.”

Tip #3 – Don’t Go Overboard – If you are trying to get lover back, it’s only normal to want to do everything in your power to make it happen. For many, this means calling their ex many times a day, driving by, or generally becoming a nuisance. Unfortunately, this has the opposite effect and may drive your ex further away. Limit yourself to one call a day – or even every three days. The next tip goes into more detail on how to use this strategy to your advantage.

Tip #4 – Become Desirable – It’s only human nature to want what we can’t have, and this is the absolutely key to get lover back if you have failed with all of the above tips. Instead of sitting around, calling your ex constantly and moping, you need to get out there and have some fun. Schedule a girl or boys night out, and don’t be afraid to bump into your ex. When they see how vibrant and fun you are, they’ll start to wonder if maybe they wrong. 

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If you consistently use these tips, you’ll be on the right road to healing that relationship and you will be able to get lover back.

Use Boyfriend Girlfriend Quizzes For Fun Not Advice

Boyfriend girlfriend quizzes can be fun to take. You can find them in many different magazines aimed at women, and all over the Internet. There will be a set of questions that can vary from asking about your favorite thing to do together, to how much you know about your boyfriend’s past girlfriends. But boyfriend girlfriend quizzes are really just mean to be fun, not some sort of couple therapy. So have fun with them!

Some are designed for you to take in which you’ll answer questions about your boyfriend only. Based on your answers about things like how often he says he loves you, or how often he takes you out, you’ll get an answer. Many of these quizzes are a bit tongue in cheek, and are designed just for fun. So if you get a bad answer, look closely at the quiz.

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If the possible answers you could have selected are all a bit wild and exaggerated, then it’s more a joke quiz than something you could really just your relationship by. Very often, multiple choice quizzes are designed this way, with humorous or outrageous choices for you to choose between. These are clearly just for fun.

Some quizzes have you answering questions about what you think your boyfriend is thinking. While these can be fun too, realize that you can’t read minds. No matter what you think he might say or do, you can’t be sure. So don’t take these results too seriously.

Boyfriend girlfriend quizzes that want yes or no answers are more likely to attempt to give real advice. Judging by how many yes and no answers you give, the quiz will give you a quick assessment of your relationship.

These can be a little more accurate if the questions are reasonable ones. Just a quick read of the questions and the possible results should let you know if it’s meant to be humorous or they’re really trying to give relationship advice. Watch the tone of what they say if it’s difficult to tell.

Then there are those quizzes that are designed for you take together. Or that intend for you to ask your boyfriend questions. If your boyfriend thinks it sounds like a fun idea, then by all means enjoy it. But if he’s resistant to the idea of boyfriend girlfriend quizzes, don’t force the issue.

Even though you’re aware of the type of quiz it is and decide to do it just for fun, he might take it too seriously. There’s always the chance that with even the most tongue in cheek quiz, you’ll get a “bad” answer. And no matter how silly the questions or the possible answers, he might not understand that it’s just a joke and could take it as a criticism.

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On the other hand, don’t take a quiz and then make too much of the answer yourself. No matter how serious they’re intended to be, boyfriend girlfriend quizzes can’t really accurately tell you anything you don’t already know!

Top 3 Reasons Why Men Dump Women

No one likes to be rejected.  This is especially true for women. One form of rejection is being dumped by the person whom you really love or are in a relationship with. Being dumped is never fun.  It can be the source of a great deal of pain, confusion, anger, and hurt.

There was a time when women were the ones who did the vast majority of dumping.  However, this certainly isn't true anymore.  Men, increasingly, are dumping women.  As a woman, who has been dumped, you may not fully understand the motives behind his actions.  Men are not quite as complex as women, when it comes to these sorts of things.  This article was written to help you find some of the answers to the question of “why men dump women?”

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Here are the top three reasons of why men dump women:

1.Lack of Communication

Communication is very important in every relationship. A lack of communication would definitely mean the end of a relationship. Hence, it is often cited as one of the top reasons of why men break up with the woman they are with.

2.Women Become Demanding

Another reason why women are dumped by men is because as time goes by, they become more and more demanding.  Women, Western women in particular,  have a tendency to try and control anything and everything about the relationship, sometimes even the man himself.  They often will try to set rules and limits on their male counterpart.  Women often will give the men a hard time about them hanging out with their friends, what they watch on T.V., working late, etc...Some men will tolerate this type of behavior.  However, the ones that finally get fed up with it, and end it, usually cite this as a reason why they broke up.

3.Being Too Reliant On Men

There are times when women become too clingy, needy, and reliant on their man.  Its okay for a woman to play up the “damsel in distress” routine once in a while.  In fact, most men enjoy playing the role of “hero.”  However, it can be taken too far and becomes quite annoying if done on a regular basis.  Most men want a woman who is independent, and can make decisions on her own.  Some women insist that the man spend every free minute of every free day with her.  It is healthy for people in a relationship to have lives outside the relationship.  If the woman makes the man the center of her life and becomes too obsessed, it usually will be too much for the man.

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Indeed, it is not only women who hold the power to dump men because men also have that power.  These reasons are by no means conclusive.  There are many reasons why men dump women.  The best thing you can do if you were dumped by a man, is to learn from your mistakes, and try not to repeat them in the next relationship.

Surviving A Breakup - 3 Things To Help

Surviving a breakup can feel impossible, especially if you didn’t really want the relationship to end. But even if you were the one who decided it was over, it can feel crummy to have such an important part of your life end. There are three important things you can to help with surviving a breakup.

First, let yourself be sad. It’s natural to not want to feel sad. None of us likes to be upset or depressed. But when a relationship ends, no matter who ended it, you lose a part of your life. If you haven’t been dating long, the sad period probably won’t last that long. But for a long-term relationship, you might be sad for a long time.

It’s important, as painful as it is, to allow yourself to feel that way. The tendency is to avoid those feelings and try to move on to something that feels better. But being sad is a necessary step in the healing process.

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Letting yourself feel the sadness will let you deal with the emotions and the pain. Remember that surviving a breakup is more than just moving on. If you can deal with the bad feelings, you’ll be better to able to experience the good feelings that come when you’ve moved on.

Second, keep busy. You have to deal with the sadness and not deny it or push it aside, but that doesn’t mean you can or should let yourself wallow in it. If you feel like spending the entire day in bed crying, you can let yourself do that. But the next day, even if you feel that way again, make yourself do something else.

Let yourself cry for an hour, and then find an activity to help distract you. Even if it’s only watching a movie, at least you’ll be able to concentrate on something else for brief periods of time.

Keep in mind that no matter how “active” your activity might be, sad thoughts and memories will still creep in. Even if you’re solving a hard puzzle and concentrating to distract yourself, now and then a memory will pop up and your mind will be back on the breakup. This is normal.

You just have to deal with the feeling briefly and not let it sidetrack you. Feel it, cry for a bit if you need to, and then keep concentrating on your activity. Soon, the sad thoughts and feelings will pop up less and less when you’re doing other things.

Finally, decide to forgive your ex. Surviving a breakup isn’t just about leaving one relationship and looking for another.

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You need to resolve things in the old relationship to help you be more emotionally healthy in the next relationship. If you were hurt in the relationship, forgive your ex for his or her part in that.

This might seem an impossible task. Start by realizing that it really does take two, and that surviving a breakup is more important than having someone to blame for it.

Relationship Advice For Men Who Want To Keep Their Girlfriends

Okay, so your girlfriend probably won’t walk out on you because you left your socks on the floor, but that doesn’t mean there aren’t still a few critical factors that, if ignored, could have her heading for the door.

Even if you think you know what makes your girlfriend tick, you may be surprised at some of the things you’ve been overlooking.

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Express your love

I know what you’re thinking: “But I do show my love! I bought her a…” Stop right there. 

Unfortunately, material gifts and even the amount of time and energy you spend helping go right over some women’s heads. Many women don’t truly feel loved unless they hear the “I love you” fairly frequently.

No, your girlfriend hasn’t forgotten all the nice things you’ve done; she just thinks maybe your feelings have changed since then. Yeah, that’s right: since yesterday. See, the thing is women continually re-assess their relationships. Men tend to get comfortable and assume if there are no fights, then everything’s dandy. That’s exactly how so many guys get blindsided by break ups introduced with “Honey, we need to talk.”

So go ahead and tell her in so many words that you love her. If you have a hard time saying it, write a little note and slip it in her wallet or stick it on the bathroom mirror.  If that’s still a little to awkward for you, make a point of thanking her for something routine like making dinner or acknowledging something she’s done well.

Listen

Imagine starting an important conversation with your girlfriend or wife only to notice her staring into space as you talk. Wouldn’t you feel a little rejected? This is the same situation a lot of women face with their boyfriends or husbands, who often don’t even notice they’re spacing out. When you’re girlfriend talks, try to put aside what your doing and really listen.

That doesn’t mean you aren’t allowed to have some quiet time to yourself, though. Whether you’re trying to finish a report for work the next day or just want to watch the game, if you gently explain that you’d rather have the chat at a later time, a real lady will give you your space.

Use honesty wisely

As much as we may want to believe honesty is the best policy, anyone with a little life experience will tell you it isn’t always. While outright lies are a no-no, a little tact and diplomacy can go a long way towards keeping peace in the house.

What that means is the correct answer to “Do I look fat in this?” is not “No, you look 10 pounds lighter,” but something like “Can’t say. You look good to me no matter what you wear.” Sound corny? Try it sometime and I bet you’ll like the result.

Being tactful doesn’t mean you should keep quite about things that really bother you, though. It’s better to bring problems to light in than let your resentment simmer and risk blowing up at her one day.

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When both partners are willing have a little patience and keep an open mind, love relationships don’t have to been filled with frustration and drama. Get some good relationship advice from men from the right source and your relationships should be smooth sailing from here on out.

Steps For Surviving A Break Up

Surviving a break up is a painful experience.  You may feel rejected.  You may be doubting your own self worth.  You may not feel like getting out of bed in the morning.  One thing that may help you is to know that most people have already gone about the process of surviving a break up and have come out stronger for it.

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Here are some of the steps for surviving a break up.

First of all, allow yourself to mourn the end of the relationship.  Your ex was almost like an appendage to you.  You identified him or her as a part of you.  You were two halves of a couple.  Just as you would be lost if your right arm was cut off, losing a significant other can be painful.

So, spend some time grieving for the relationship's end.  It can actually be a healthy thing to do.

But at some point (hopefully soon), you have to move on.  You will need to go through a process of being angry at your ex.  He or she hurt you and you have every right to feel mad at them.

Here’s a tip for surviving a break up in the anger stage.  Write a long letter to your ex spilling out your guts about how you feel.  Put every emotion, experience, and feeling into the letter.  But don't mail it to them.  Whatever you do, don't mail it.  Instead, light a candle and burn it slowly over the flame.  As your letter goes up in smoke, release your anger.

At this point, it is time to start rebuilding your life.  Surviving a break up means getting back into the game.  You should definitely lean on the support of friends and family during this difficult time.  The people closest to you will understand that you are having trouble putting your life back together and they should offer you the support that you need to heal.

Also, you should look for activities that spark your interest.  Perhaps there were things that your ex didn't like to do with you that you've missed.  Renew your interest in these things.  If you have had a lifelong desire to learn something, there’s no time like after a break up to try.  You will probably make new friends when you start a new activity and you might even meet a love interest who shares your passion.

At some point, you will want to start dating again.  Don’t expect your first few dates to turn into lifetime relationships.  Just test the waters.  Go out for coffee or a drink.  Have fun and don’t be too serious about these things.

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Surviving a break up is always a painful process.  But, you are capable of moving on with your life.  Look at the end of the relationship as a chance for growth.  Millions of people have survived a split with their ex and you will too.


Surviving A Breakup - Write It Down

Right after a relationship ends, surviving a breakup might seem an impossible task. It hurts so much, and it’s easy to think that you’ll never feel happy again. It’s also easy to think that you might never find someone else. A good step to take when surviving a breakup is to start writing all these feelings down.

Journaling is something that millions of people do every day for a variety of reasons. Some people have kept diaries since they were children. At first they simply wrote down the important things that happened that day. Many children’s diaries are just filled with little lists about what they did all day.

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As people get older, their journals and diaries tend to become more introspective. They write about an event and how it made them feel or what they thought it meant. Sometimes they write about how they think a certain event might affect them in the future.

Journaling or keeping a diary can help with surviving a breakup by giving you an outlet to express yourself. You can write things down that you might be uncomfortable saying to someone else. Embarrassing things or things that really upset you so much that you don’t really want to tell anyone can be “told” to your diary.

Many people never start journaling because they don’t think they know how. But there really is no special way to do it. You don’t have to have a special diary or journal to begin. You can write in a regular notebook or keep a file on your computer for your thoughts.

But you can purchase a special book to write in if you want. It can be as casual or as formal as you choose. If it makes you happy, purchase a special journal with a pretty cover and fine paper inside. If not, grab a spiral notebook or open that file in your word processor and start a journal.

As you’re surviving a breakup, when you feel especially sad write about why you think that is and what you think you can do about it. When you’re missing your ex, write about it. It’s okay to cry or feel upset while writing. In fact, it’s good to do so. You’re getting it out.

You don’t have to write in your journal every day. You don’t have to start every entry “Dear Diary” or do it in any specific way. You might scrawl down one sentence, “I hate this!” and three days later write 5 pages of things you won’t miss about your ex and why you’re glad it’s over. All of these are good for you.

Another way to use writing to help get over a relationship is to write a letter to your ex. Write down everything you want to say to him or her, good and bad, and be brutally honest. Now that you’ve purged yourself, throw the letter away.

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Surviving a breakup can be made easier by writing down and dealing with your feelings, so give it a try.

Relationship Breakups - How To Stay Friends

Relationship breakups don’t always mean that the person you’re breaking up with needs to be cut completely out of your life. Many people continue to have warm and satisfying friendships with their exes by making sure that their relationship breakups are done without hurting anyone more than necessary.

There are situations where you know that you don’t really want that person to continue to be in your life. Maybe things that happened during the relationship are just too painful. You feel like you can’t forgive him or her for what they did. 

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You might be surprised later on once the initial hurt has passed at how differently you feel. While the chances that you would want to get back together with that person are slim, you might discover you really miss having him or her in your life.

This is never more true than when your ex was your friend first. When you had a great friendship and that lead to a romantic relationship, relationship breakups don’t just end the romance, but now you’ve lost that great friendship, too.

It doesn’t have to be that way, though, if the other person wants to keep you in his or her life, too. The only way to find this out is to have a conversation about it. You might be in for a pleasant surprise to discover that your ex still wants to be friends, too.

If you talk to your boyfriend, though, and he has an attitude or is angry and doesn’t want to continue a friendship, then accept it but don’t burn any bridges. Don’t go out with an attitude or become insulting.

There’s always the chance that he can’t see past the hurt and anger he’s feeling, and could change his mind later. But if you throw a few parting shots to make the pain and hurt even worse, you might be sabotaging your chances of having this person as a friend later.

Relationship breakups are never easy, and it’s not necessarily easy to stay friends afterwards. This is true even if you were best friends before you began the romantic relationship. When you’re in a romance with someone, that person knows intimate details about you and your life.

And after a breakup, some people might see those tidbits of information as weapons. It’s very easy to insult someone in a way that you know will really hurt them when you’re hurting, too. The desire to lash out or to protect yourself by striking the first verbal blow is a natural emotional response.

No one knows the little details that can wound you quite as deeply as someone you’ve been in a relationship with. If your ex uses these little things to hurt you, try to keep it in perspective. Yes, it’s painful, but he’s coming from a place of anger, too. 

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Don’t fight back like that. Take the high road, and be respectful. Even if your relationship breakups don’t end in you remaining friends, you’ll feel better for not making the situation even worse.

Proven Ways Of Mending A Broken Heart

The best part about being a human, is the ability to actually deeply care about and love someone.  To be in love is probably one of the greatest emotions we can experience.  When you're in a relationship and everything is going well, it's sometimes easy to take the relationship for granted. 

Unfortunately, relationships, even the ones you thought were going smoothly, can come to an abrupt end.  While truly caring about someone and loving them is great and a source of pleasure, when the relationship is over it can be a huge source of pain, sorrow, and a broken heart.  If the break up is recent, you may not believe it, but there are things you can do to begin mending a broken heart.

Unfortunately, there is no magic pill, potion, lotion, or method for instantly mending a broken heart.   It is imperative that you understand this.  After a break up, there will be times when your emotions are going to be up, down, sideways, diagonal, and every other way, but right.  

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In fact, you'll probably experience combination's of emotions you never thought possible.  One example is anger and sadness mixed together.  You'll find that sometimes your emotions can change at the drop of a hat.  You'll be feeling fine, laughing one minute, the next you'll be really sad, even crying.   The most important thing you have to realize is that it all seems bleak and dark now.  However, as time presses on, things will get better. 

It is critical that you try to reign in your emotions.  Does this mean you should bottle up your emotions?  No, absolutely not.  However, it does mean that you shouldn't let your sadness, anger, depression, or any other emotion control you for long periods of time. If you're feeling sad, allow yourself to have a “pity party” for a maximum of 15 minutes.  Then, say to yourself “Okay, that's enough.  It's time to stop.

Mending a broken heart is also going to require you to try and stay busy.  If you give your mind a lot of idle time to think, it will probably want to think about your break up.  This isn't good.  Try to keep your mind and body active.  You probably won't feel like doing this very much, but its important.   Go somewhere, do something, try to drag friends along.  Tell them to not let you talk about the break up.  Try not to sit around the house and do nothing.  That's the worst thing you can do.

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Falling in love is usually the easy part.  Mending a broken heart is not.  That's just one of the cruel realities of life.  Everything has an equal and an opposite.  The wonderful, uplifting, feelings you get from being in love, are the exact opposite to the miserable, depression and sadness, that go along with a break up.  Time, an active lifestyle, happy thoughts, and good friends will get you through this tough time.

Reasons For A Boyfriend Break Up

Have you had a boyfriend break up?  Maybe you were the one calling it quits.  Or, perhaps he dumped you.  Maybe it was a so called “mutual decision.”  In any case, sometimes a boyfriend break up is devastating.

There are many reasons for a boyfriend break up.  I’m going to look at three in this article.

The first reason is that he cheated on you.  You need to be very clear in your mind what cheating means.  Does that mean that he actually went out on a date with another girl?  Does it mean that he was making out with her at a party?  Does it mean that he danced with another girl?  Does it mean that he simply looked at one?  Defining what you mean by cheating can be very important.

If you have never had a talk about what “exclusiveness” in your relationship means, he may have had no idea that you would consider what he did cheating.  He may even be stunned that you would consider a boyfriend break up over that!  

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If you want to take him back, then you need to have a talk about expectations.  If he can agree to the expressed rules, you can get back together.  If they’re not something he can live with, then you are better off without him in the long run.

Another reason for a boyfriend break up is that you move in different places.  Sometimes this happens in a physical sense.  For instance, your family moves to another state or you and he go to colleges in different locations.  Most relationships cannot survive a great distance in geography and the break up may be mutual, but still painful.

Other times this happens because you start to move in different social spheres in the same place.  You may join the cheerleading squad and he’s not comfortable with your new friends, for instance.  Or, he gets serious about a religious preference that you have no interest in.  When this happens, it is just time to move on.

Finally, a boyfriend break up can occur when you need a different kind of lifestyle.  You may just be tired of having to cater to a boy’s needs ahead of your own, for instance.  Or, you may be bored with him.  He may have seemed glamorous and exciting at first, but now he’s just a pain.  You may have thought you needed a boyfriend because all of your other friends were pairing up, but now you realize that you need your own space and are not ready for a relationship.

In this case, the guy may agree with you or he may try to win you back.  But, make sure you put your own needs first.

Keep in mind that there are plenty of other guys out there who are eager to have a girl like you, so there’s no need to have a relationship that isn’t working for you.  Although it may hurt at first, you will survive a boyfriend break up.

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Take A Should I Break Up With My Boyfriend Quiz

A “should I break up with my boyfriend” quiz is something a person doesn’t take unless she has doubts about the relationship. If you’re considering taking such a quiz, you might not need the quiz to tell you the answer. If you’re unhappy, or you don’t think he treats you right, you shouldn’t worry about taking a “should I break up with my boyfriend” quiz. You already know.

But if you want to take such a quiz, they can open your eyes to some things in your relationship. A “should I break up with my boyfriend” quiz usually has multiple choice questions that offer up several different scenarios for each question.

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If you take the quiz, just on a whim, and realize that most of the answers you choose show the relationship or the boyfriend isn’t ideal, that can get you thinking about your boyfriend and about how things should change. So if you’re happy with the way things are, you might want to skip the quiz.

On the other hand, you might want to compare your relationship with what the quiz considers to be a good and bad relationship. Of course, you have to keep in mind that many of these quizzes are put together more as a joke than anything else.

If it’s a “should I break up with my boyfriend” quiz you find online, especially at a site where you can take quiz after quiz on almost any subject, then beware. Anyone can make those quizzes. You could make one advising people when to break up, too. They’re just based on what one person thinks.

If it’s a quiz from a magazine and was created by someone with actual human relations or relationship expertise, then you can take the results a little more seriously. But even if the quiz appears to be completely sincere, you shouldn’t break up with your boyfriend only based on the quiz results.

If you’re taking the quiz for fun, definitely discount any answers you get. If you’re taking it because you have doubts and you wonder if you should break up with your boyfriend, then pay a little closer attention. Read your results carefully to decide if it’s really accurate for your situation.

These quizzes aren’t designed to actually tell you what to do when it comes to your boyfriend. They’re designed more to give you a guidelines about how things should be in your relationship under certain circumstances.

If your answers vary far from what the quiz author believes to be what is healthy and normal in a good relationship, you might want to examine things a little closer and see what you can do to help the situation. 

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Everything wrong in the relationship won’t be entirely your boyfriend’s fault, after all. A good relationship really does take two. And if you wanted to take the quiz to start with, if you think about it you’ll probably realize that it didn’t take a “should I break up with my boyfriend” quiz to tell you what you needed to know.

The Hardest Thing To Do Breaking Up Advice

There is no easy way to bring a relationship to an end, whether you have just been dating or in a marriage. If you follow this break up advice it will help make breaking up the relationship less painful. Keep in mind this is only for non-violent situations. If there is violence involved, get help to end the relationship and keep yourself safe.

Be Sure:

This may be the hardest thing that either of you have had to face. If what problems you have together can be solved together, then they should be. If you are sure that the differences are irreconcilable and you have thought through the problems extensively then you should break up. If there is any hope the relationship then get some relationship advice from a counselor.

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Be Quick:

If you have made up your mind then you need to make your move. Once you decide, you must act. Staying in the situation for much longer will only increase the tension and make the situation worse.

Be Prepared:

Make sure that you have your thoughts completely gathered and they are rational and well constructed. Choose a time of the day when it is best for the both of you. Do it in a private place where there is quiet and a chance for you to discuss anything that needs to be.

Be There:

Do not take the easy way out and breakup in a text message or with a note on the table. The person you are breaking up with deserves to have you face them and tell them what is happening. Give them some time to discuss and answer questions.

Be Clean:

Clean up any issues that may be unresolved. If there are loose ends, tie them up. There will be things that need to be resolved in order for both of you to be able to move on. The best breaking up advice you will ever receive is to make a clean break.

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Be Gone:

Move on. Make a clean break and get on with your life. Don't leave any questions unanswered but get them answered soon. Accept that there were mistakes made and move on. Do your best to let go of any grudges. Let this be a clean slate.

Be Nice:

It is easy for things to get really ugly after a break up. Do yourself a favor and be as nice as possible to lessen the hostility. They may not deserve it in some cases but you will be able to move on a lot better if you stay nice through the whole situation. Anyone giving breaking up relationship advice will encourage you to keep your head.

In any case, breaking up is a divorce of one from another. It is important to get as much breaking up advice as you can. It might be necessary in some situations to get some counseling for breaking up advice. Just do it in the best way possible. It will make your move to your new life much easier.

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