Do You Know If Your Relationship Is On the Rocks?

No-one wants a relationship to end and if it does it can sometimes come as a big shock, leaving you feeling confused and not sure why it happened.  A break up can leave you feeling betrayed, rejected and can really put a dent in your self-confidence.

After a break up you will often find yourself wondering why it happened and what you could have done to save the relationship.  You will begin to ask yourself what you did wrong and what you could have done differently.  All those ‘what if’ questions will start running through your mind.

Some relationships, even after a break up, can manage to repair the damage and get back on track.  But it really is much easier to save a relationship if you can prevent it from reaching break up stage.  As soon as you see any signs of trouble in a relationship you need to act fast to resolve it.

You can only take steps to resolve any issues if you are aware that there are issues.  If you can recognize the warning signs of a relationship in trouble then you have a good chance of repairing it and preventing a break up from happening.  It really is essential to know what signs to look for so you can save your relationship before it’s too late.

Let’s take a look at some of the common warning signs of a break up.

Is your partner avoiding you?  If your relationship has reached the stage when your partner seems to be spending more time with his mates than he does with you then this can be a warning sign that trouble is pending.  Is your partner avoiding your phone calls?  Is your partner avoiding spending any romantic time with you?  Has he increased his night out with the boys from once a week to three or four times a week?  A yes answer to these questions is a strong warning sign that your relationship is in strife.

Has communication between you and your partner become uncomfortable or non-existent?  A happy relationship needs to have good communication so if it seems that you are having trouble communicating with your partner then there might be something to worry about.  Lack of communication goes hand in hand with the avoidance issue – if you’re partner is heading off to bed early rather than sit and watch a movie with you, then he is avoiding you and avoiding communication.

Do you seem to be arguing more than normal?    All relationships have some problems and there will be arguments from time to time; that is completely normal.  No two people can agree 100% about absolutely everything; it is just human nature to disagree about some issues.  The problem comes when there seems to be more and more arguing and less and less normal conversation.  There is also the severity of the arguments and whether they have changed from general arguing to very hostile arguing.  Your relationship may be in trouble if you find that arguments have become a regular occurrence and your partner seems to be picking fights quite a lot.  Sometimes prior to a breakup a person may pick fights because it helps them to justify their intentions when they do finally make the break and end the relationship.

Avoidance, lack of communication and a lot of arguing are three big warning signs that your relationship is in trouble.  If you are aware of these signs and notice them soon enough then you can work toward resolving any problems and saving your relationship.

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Advice on How to Effortlessly Save Your Relationship

Relationships always start off happy and full of excitement and there is no better feeling than that ‘new relationship’ feeling.  Your first fight is terrible because it recognizes a sign of maturity in a relationship and that new feeling is fading.  Then if you start to feel that your relationship is in trouble; that can just be absolutely devastating.

As soon as you start seeing some signs of trouble in your relationship you can start to panic and might even start acting and thinking irrationally – which really doesn’t help the situation one bit.  How you act now can make or break your relationship so if you really want to save this amazing relationship then the following tips might be useful to you.

What is the Problem in the Relationship?

The first step to saving a relationship is to identify the cause of the problems that you are having.  All relationships will have some problems but some problems are worse than others and these problems are the ones that can break a relationship if they aren’t resolved.  Even the small issues are worth working at getting resolved as even though they are small, they can build up over time and become the cause of a failed relationship.  So to save your relationship and your love for your partner, it is important to identify any problems and work through them together.

Talk to Your Partner about the Problem.

A relationship is a two person journey and you can’t solve all problems on your own.  So if there is a problem in your relationship you will need to sit down with your partner and discuss it, don’t just try to resolve the issue yourself.  By talking about any problems that you have then you can both work toward solving the problem and saving your relationship.

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Do You and Your Partner Still Love Each Other?

A relationship won’t work without love to hold it together and sometimes people just fall out of love.  Love is a very powerful tool and if you both still love each other then you should be able to use that tool to save your relationship.  If your love for each other has died off then it may be time to say goodbye, but if there is still a glimmer of love then your relationship has hope.

It is possible to save a relationship that has problems if you can keep the above tips in mind.  Love is a two way street and you both need to feel love toward each other and be committed to saving your relationship.  If your partner doesn’t want to be in the relationship at all then you can’t force him to stay, but if he does still love you then there will always be hope.  Stay calm, look at the problems rationally and work them out together.

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Getting Beyond He Said-She Said

The term, "He said/she said" is often heard in the unfortunate case of rape.  In this situation the term applies to the fact that when there is little factual evidence on which to base a decision the jury is left trying to determine who's story they believe and the case becomes one of her word against his.  These cases perhaps illustrate the problems regarding he said/she said that couples are faced with in a relationship.  

Beyond the fact that in a rape case one or both of the parties may not be telling the truth, exists the underlying problem that men and women think and process information differently. The differences between male and female gender include differences in thought process, sensitivity, memory, and communication.  A successful relationship is one that recognizes the difference between men and women and is able to get beyond the he said/she said scenarios.  

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Men and women have a different thought process when it comes to solving problems.  While both sexes are capable of solving problems equally well the thought process involved in coming to a resolution varies between them. For men a problem is an opportunity for them to demonstrate their problem solving skills in a quick and efficient manner.  Men see having the problem solved as the ultimate goal and they believe that the best solution is the one that is quickest and most efficient. 

Women on the other hand see a problem as an opportunity to work together and reach a resolution.  Women relish the chance to communicate about the problem and the act of working together to solve the problem is more important than actually solving the problem.  Women may feel closer to their partner, even if the problem still exists, if she feels that the resolution process drew them closer together.  Understanding that women and men view the problem solving process differently will help a relationship to prosper. 

Sensitivity is another area where ladies and gentlemen differ.  Women have a heightened sense of sensitivity relative to men. This heightened sensitivity results in women being more prone to act on their emotions rather than on rational thought. A woman’s sensitivity allows her to understand her own feelings as well as those of others better so her reactions tend to take feelings into consideration above logic. 

However, men do not have the same level of sensitivity and therefore are more likely to make their decisions based solely on logic and not take feelings and emotions into consideration.  This disparity can result in problems during a relationship because the woman assumes that the man intentionally tried to hurt their feelings if they make a decision that has this effect while the man may grow frustrated if he believes the woman made an irrational decision.  Realizing that this difference exists will help a couple to get beyond he said/she said. 

Men and Women also differ in terms of memory.  Men have a memory that is stronger in situations where they can recall the details of an event by making an association with something concrete such as a location or item.  For example men are more apt to remember an event that took place in a location that they are able to visualize well. 

Women on the other hand have a memory that is stronger when they are able to associate the emotions felt with that memory to other memories where they had similar emotions.  This type of memory is especially problematic because when a women becomes angry with her partner, she is often able to recall other situations where he has angered her. Unless the difference in memory is recognized it can become a source of frustration in a relationship when the man and woman don't understand why their partner doesn’t remember something that is so vivid to them. 

Men and Women also often have different communication styles which can complicate a relationship.  Men tend to be more introspective about their problems and choose to deal with them internally and without discussing them with their partner.  When they do decide to discuss a problem it's usually after much thought and careful consideration.  Women on the other hand enjoy conversing about their problems with their partner and believe that doing so helps them to understand their problem better and come to a solution more easily.  Women often use communication as a method for reaching a conclusion.  They view the discussion as a way to figure out a solution.  The he said/she said aspects of communications must be understood to avoid frustration and disappointment in a relationship.

Men and women have different styles when it comes to problem solving, sensitivity, memory and communication in a relationship.  Careful observance and understanding of these differences is necessary for a relationship to flourish.  Understanding these he said/she said principals and being willing to get beyond them will help to minimize difficulties in a relationship; in regards to gender differences.

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Use Boyfriend Girlfriend Quizzes For Fun Not Advice

Boyfriend girlfriend quizzes can be fun to take. You can find them in many different magazines aimed at women, and all over the Internet. There will be a set of questions that can vary from asking about your favorite thing to do together, to how much you know about your boyfriend’s past girlfriends. But boyfriend girlfriend quizzes are really just mean to be fun, not some sort of couple therapy. So have fun with them!

Some are designed for you to take in which you’ll answer questions about your boyfriend only. Based on your answers about things like how often he says he loves you, or how often he takes you out, you’ll get an answer. Many of these quizzes are a bit tongue in cheek, and are designed just for fun. So if you get a bad answer, look closely at the quiz.

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If the possible answers you could have selected are all a bit wild and exaggerated, then it’s more a joke quiz than something you could really just your relationship by. Very often, multiple choice quizzes are designed this way, with humorous or outrageous choices for you to choose between. These are clearly just for fun.

Some quizzes have you answering questions about what you think your boyfriend is thinking. While these can be fun too, realize that you can’t read minds. No matter what you think he might say or do, you can’t be sure. So don’t take these results too seriously.

Boyfriend girlfriend quizzes that want yes or no answers are more likely to attempt to give real advice. Judging by how many yes and no answers you give, the quiz will give you a quick assessment of your relationship.

These can be a little more accurate if the questions are reasonable ones. Just a quick read of the questions and the possible results should let you know if it’s meant to be humorous or they’re really trying to give relationship advice. Watch the tone of what they say if it’s difficult to tell.

Then there are those quizzes that are designed for you take together. Or that intend for you to ask your boyfriend questions. If your boyfriend thinks it sounds like a fun idea, then by all means enjoy it. But if he’s resistant to the idea of boyfriend girlfriend quizzes, don’t force the issue.

Even though you’re aware of the type of quiz it is and decide to do it just for fun, he might take it too seriously. There’s always the chance that with even the most tongue in cheek quiz, you’ll get a “bad” answer. And no matter how silly the questions or the possible answers, he might not understand that it’s just a joke and could take it as a criticism.

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On the other hand, don’t take a quiz and then make too much of the answer yourself. No matter how serious they’re intended to be, boyfriend girlfriend quizzes can’t really accurately tell you anything you don’t already know!

Steps For Surviving A Break Up

Surviving a break up is a painful experience.  You may feel rejected.  You may be doubting your own self worth.  You may not feel like getting out of bed in the morning.  One thing that may help you is to know that most people have already gone about the process of surviving a break up and have come out stronger for it.

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Here are some of the steps for surviving a break up.

First of all, allow yourself to mourn the end of the relationship.  Your ex was almost like an appendage to you.  You identified him or her as a part of you.  You were two halves of a couple.  Just as you would be lost if your right arm was cut off, losing a significant other can be painful.

So, spend some time grieving for the relationship's end.  It can actually be a healthy thing to do.

But at some point (hopefully soon), you have to move on.  You will need to go through a process of being angry at your ex.  He or she hurt you and you have every right to feel mad at them.

Here’s a tip for surviving a break up in the anger stage.  Write a long letter to your ex spilling out your guts about how you feel.  Put every emotion, experience, and feeling into the letter.  But don't mail it to them.  Whatever you do, don't mail it.  Instead, light a candle and burn it slowly over the flame.  As your letter goes up in smoke, release your anger.

At this point, it is time to start rebuilding your life.  Surviving a break up means getting back into the game.  You should definitely lean on the support of friends and family during this difficult time.  The people closest to you will understand that you are having trouble putting your life back together and they should offer you the support that you need to heal.

Also, you should look for activities that spark your interest.  Perhaps there were things that your ex didn't like to do with you that you've missed.  Renew your interest in these things.  If you have had a lifelong desire to learn something, there’s no time like after a break up to try.  You will probably make new friends when you start a new activity and you might even meet a love interest who shares your passion.

At some point, you will want to start dating again.  Don’t expect your first few dates to turn into lifetime relationships.  Just test the waters.  Go out for coffee or a drink.  Have fun and don’t be too serious about these things.

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Surviving a break up is always a painful process.  But, you are capable of moving on with your life.  Look at the end of the relationship as a chance for growth.  Millions of people have survived a split with their ex and you will too.


Surviving A Breakup - Write It Down

Right after a relationship ends, surviving a breakup might seem an impossible task. It hurts so much, and it’s easy to think that you’ll never feel happy again. It’s also easy to think that you might never find someone else. A good step to take when surviving a breakup is to start writing all these feelings down.

Journaling is something that millions of people do every day for a variety of reasons. Some people have kept diaries since they were children. At first they simply wrote down the important things that happened that day. Many children’s diaries are just filled with little lists about what they did all day.

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As people get older, their journals and diaries tend to become more introspective. They write about an event and how it made them feel or what they thought it meant. Sometimes they write about how they think a certain event might affect them in the future.

Journaling or keeping a diary can help with surviving a breakup by giving you an outlet to express yourself. You can write things down that you might be uncomfortable saying to someone else. Embarrassing things or things that really upset you so much that you don’t really want to tell anyone can be “told” to your diary.

Many people never start journaling because they don’t think they know how. But there really is no special way to do it. You don’t have to have a special diary or journal to begin. You can write in a regular notebook or keep a file on your computer for your thoughts.

But you can purchase a special book to write in if you want. It can be as casual or as formal as you choose. If it makes you happy, purchase a special journal with a pretty cover and fine paper inside. If not, grab a spiral notebook or open that file in your word processor and start a journal.

As you’re surviving a breakup, when you feel especially sad write about why you think that is and what you think you can do about it. When you’re missing your ex, write about it. It’s okay to cry or feel upset while writing. In fact, it’s good to do so. You’re getting it out.

You don’t have to write in your journal every day. You don’t have to start every entry “Dear Diary” or do it in any specific way. You might scrawl down one sentence, “I hate this!” and three days later write 5 pages of things you won’t miss about your ex and why you’re glad it’s over. All of these are good for you.

Another way to use writing to help get over a relationship is to write a letter to your ex. Write down everything you want to say to him or her, good and bad, and be brutally honest. Now that you’ve purged yourself, throw the letter away.

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Surviving a breakup can be made easier by writing down and dealing with your feelings, so give it a try.

Relationship Breakups - How To Stay Friends

Relationship breakups don’t always mean that the person you’re breaking up with needs to be cut completely out of your life. Many people continue to have warm and satisfying friendships with their exes by making sure that their relationship breakups are done without hurting anyone more than necessary.

There are situations where you know that you don’t really want that person to continue to be in your life. Maybe things that happened during the relationship are just too painful. You feel like you can’t forgive him or her for what they did. 

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You might be surprised later on once the initial hurt has passed at how differently you feel. While the chances that you would want to get back together with that person are slim, you might discover you really miss having him or her in your life.

This is never more true than when your ex was your friend first. When you had a great friendship and that lead to a romantic relationship, relationship breakups don’t just end the romance, but now you’ve lost that great friendship, too.

It doesn’t have to be that way, though, if the other person wants to keep you in his or her life, too. The only way to find this out is to have a conversation about it. You might be in for a pleasant surprise to discover that your ex still wants to be friends, too.

If you talk to your boyfriend, though, and he has an attitude or is angry and doesn’t want to continue a friendship, then accept it but don’t burn any bridges. Don’t go out with an attitude or become insulting.

There’s always the chance that he can’t see past the hurt and anger he’s feeling, and could change his mind later. But if you throw a few parting shots to make the pain and hurt even worse, you might be sabotaging your chances of having this person as a friend later.

Relationship breakups are never easy, and it’s not necessarily easy to stay friends afterwards. This is true even if you were best friends before you began the romantic relationship. When you’re in a romance with someone, that person knows intimate details about you and your life.

And after a breakup, some people might see those tidbits of information as weapons. It’s very easy to insult someone in a way that you know will really hurt them when you’re hurting, too. The desire to lash out or to protect yourself by striking the first verbal blow is a natural emotional response.

No one knows the little details that can wound you quite as deeply as someone you’ve been in a relationship with. If your ex uses these little things to hurt you, try to keep it in perspective. Yes, it’s painful, but he’s coming from a place of anger, too. 

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Don’t fight back like that. Take the high road, and be respectful. Even if your relationship breakups don’t end in you remaining friends, you’ll feel better for not making the situation even worse.

Proven Ways Of Mending A Broken Heart

The best part about being a human, is the ability to actually deeply care about and love someone.  To be in love is probably one of the greatest emotions we can experience.  When you're in a relationship and everything is going well, it's sometimes easy to take the relationship for granted. 

Unfortunately, relationships, even the ones you thought were going smoothly, can come to an abrupt end.  While truly caring about someone and loving them is great and a source of pleasure, when the relationship is over it can be a huge source of pain, sorrow, and a broken heart.  If the break up is recent, you may not believe it, but there are things you can do to begin mending a broken heart.

Unfortunately, there is no magic pill, potion, lotion, or method for instantly mending a broken heart.   It is imperative that you understand this.  After a break up, there will be times when your emotions are going to be up, down, sideways, diagonal, and every other way, but right.  

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In fact, you'll probably experience combination's of emotions you never thought possible.  One example is anger and sadness mixed together.  You'll find that sometimes your emotions can change at the drop of a hat.  You'll be feeling fine, laughing one minute, the next you'll be really sad, even crying.   The most important thing you have to realize is that it all seems bleak and dark now.  However, as time presses on, things will get better. 

It is critical that you try to reign in your emotions.  Does this mean you should bottle up your emotions?  No, absolutely not.  However, it does mean that you shouldn't let your sadness, anger, depression, or any other emotion control you for long periods of time. If you're feeling sad, allow yourself to have a “pity party” for a maximum of 15 minutes.  Then, say to yourself “Okay, that's enough.  It's time to stop.

Mending a broken heart is also going to require you to try and stay busy.  If you give your mind a lot of idle time to think, it will probably want to think about your break up.  This isn't good.  Try to keep your mind and body active.  You probably won't feel like doing this very much, but its important.   Go somewhere, do something, try to drag friends along.  Tell them to not let you talk about the break up.  Try not to sit around the house and do nothing.  That's the worst thing you can do.

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Falling in love is usually the easy part.  Mending a broken heart is not.  That's just one of the cruel realities of life.  Everything has an equal and an opposite.  The wonderful, uplifting, feelings you get from being in love, are the exact opposite to the miserable, depression and sadness, that go along with a break up.  Time, an active lifestyle, happy thoughts, and good friends will get you through this tough time.

Take A Should I Break Up With My Boyfriend Quiz

A “should I break up with my boyfriend” quiz is something a person doesn’t take unless she has doubts about the relationship. If you’re considering taking such a quiz, you might not need the quiz to tell you the answer. If you’re unhappy, or you don’t think he treats you right, you shouldn’t worry about taking a “should I break up with my boyfriend” quiz. You already know.

But if you want to take such a quiz, they can open your eyes to some things in your relationship. A “should I break up with my boyfriend” quiz usually has multiple choice questions that offer up several different scenarios for each question.

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If you take the quiz, just on a whim, and realize that most of the answers you choose show the relationship or the boyfriend isn’t ideal, that can get you thinking about your boyfriend and about how things should change. So if you’re happy with the way things are, you might want to skip the quiz.

On the other hand, you might want to compare your relationship with what the quiz considers to be a good and bad relationship. Of course, you have to keep in mind that many of these quizzes are put together more as a joke than anything else.

If it’s a “should I break up with my boyfriend” quiz you find online, especially at a site where you can take quiz after quiz on almost any subject, then beware. Anyone can make those quizzes. You could make one advising people when to break up, too. They’re just based on what one person thinks.

If it’s a quiz from a magazine and was created by someone with actual human relations or relationship expertise, then you can take the results a little more seriously. But even if the quiz appears to be completely sincere, you shouldn’t break up with your boyfriend only based on the quiz results.

If you’re taking the quiz for fun, definitely discount any answers you get. If you’re taking it because you have doubts and you wonder if you should break up with your boyfriend, then pay a little closer attention. Read your results carefully to decide if it’s really accurate for your situation.

These quizzes aren’t designed to actually tell you what to do when it comes to your boyfriend. They’re designed more to give you a guidelines about how things should be in your relationship under certain circumstances.

If your answers vary far from what the quiz author believes to be what is healthy and normal in a good relationship, you might want to examine things a little closer and see what you can do to help the situation. 

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Everything wrong in the relationship won’t be entirely your boyfriend’s fault, after all. A good relationship really does take two. And if you wanted to take the quiz to start with, if you think about it you’ll probably realize that it didn’t take a “should I break up with my boyfriend” quiz to tell you what you needed to know.

The Hardest Thing To Do Breaking Up Advice

There is no easy way to bring a relationship to an end, whether you have just been dating or in a marriage. If you follow this break up advice it will help make breaking up the relationship less painful. Keep in mind this is only for non-violent situations. If there is violence involved, get help to end the relationship and keep yourself safe.

Be Sure:

This may be the hardest thing that either of you have had to face. If what problems you have together can be solved together, then they should be. If you are sure that the differences are irreconcilable and you have thought through the problems extensively then you should break up. If there is any hope the relationship then get some relationship advice from a counselor.

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Be Quick:

If you have made up your mind then you need to make your move. Once you decide, you must act. Staying in the situation for much longer will only increase the tension and make the situation worse.

Be Prepared:

Make sure that you have your thoughts completely gathered and they are rational and well constructed. Choose a time of the day when it is best for the both of you. Do it in a private place where there is quiet and a chance for you to discuss anything that needs to be.

Be There:

Do not take the easy way out and breakup in a text message or with a note on the table. The person you are breaking up with deserves to have you face them and tell them what is happening. Give them some time to discuss and answer questions.

Be Clean:

Clean up any issues that may be unresolved. If there are loose ends, tie them up. There will be things that need to be resolved in order for both of you to be able to move on. The best breaking up advice you will ever receive is to make a clean break.

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Be Gone:

Move on. Make a clean break and get on with your life. Don't leave any questions unanswered but get them answered soon. Accept that there were mistakes made and move on. Do your best to let go of any grudges. Let this be a clean slate.

Be Nice:

It is easy for things to get really ugly after a break up. Do yourself a favor and be as nice as possible to lessen the hostility. They may not deserve it in some cases but you will be able to move on a lot better if you stay nice through the whole situation. Anyone giving breaking up relationship advice will encourage you to keep your head.

In any case, breaking up is a divorce of one from another. It is important to get as much breaking up advice as you can. It might be necessary in some situations to get some counseling for breaking up advice. Just do it in the best way possible. It will make your move to your new life much easier.

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What A Good Quiz For A Relationship Can Reveal

Can a quiz for a relationship really tell you anything you don’t already know? The answer is often yes, but you have to make sure you’re taking a well designed quiz created by someone with some real credentials. Find one of those and there are some very interesting things you can learn about what’s in store for your relationship.

Overall Compatibility

Don’t feel like relying on your horoscope to guide you to your soul mate? A good quiz for a relationship may not be able to tell you where your soul mate is, but it can give you an idea whether or not the person you’re with now might be it. Quiz results can give you insight into important factors like compatibility of beliefs, habits, and long-term goals.

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Healthy or Not?

If you’ve ever been stuck in an unhealthy relationship that involved physical or psychological abuse, no doubt you never want to be in one again. The worst thing about these situations is that it’s often hard to see where things are headed until its too late.

That’s where a quiz for a relationship comes in. By asking the right questions, a relationship quiz can help you pick up on early warning signs that you and your partner may not only be incompatible, but may actually be in an unhealthy situation. 

Eternal love or Dead End?

No matter how crazy you are about each other right now, you can never be 100% sure it will last. You can, however, get some idea whether when you have a good chance or you’re doomed to break up, though. Questions about how you envision the future with your partner and what kinds of plans you’ve made together can give you a fair amount of insight into this. 

What Problems Are In Store?

Yep, every relationship has some problems. Having an idea about what yours might be gives you a chance to head them off before they get too serious. A well designed quiz for a relationship uses questions that help you zero in on potential problems that could grow into something big.

The quiz does this by asking things like how you deal with your partner’s annoying habits, what causes of any moments of tension between you, and what emotions seem to characterize your relationship.

How Others See You!

Even if there aren’t any problems between you, your relationship could still face pressure from outside forces. It might be due to difference in age, race, social status, or any number of things you overlook when you’re deeply in love. Unfortunately, your family and close friends may not overlook these things and constant criticism from them puts a strain on the relationship. You need to be aware of what social problems you might run into so you can discuss how you’re going to handle them.

A quiz for a relationship can tell you a lot about what you and your partner you have to look forward to in the near future. Just remember, though, no two relationships are the same, so no matter how accurate the test, be ready for a few surprises all the same.

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